There are those out there who would say that I'm "tight fisted". That the inside of my wallet is covered with the fossils of long dead wasps.
I don't know, because I try never to open it - but that's besides the point.
I just wanted to sat that the last time I refueled my car I had achieved all of 50 miles per gallon (or 17.7 km a litre, for those from the colonies) over 150 or so miles.
And believe me when I tell you that it was the hardest driving I've ever done.
Constantly sticking to 55-58 miles an hour. Ducking, dodging and overtaking only to maintain that steady rolling speed. Delaying traffic in a light year long queue behind me, ignoring the screams and pain caused to my fellow commuters...
It takes real discipline to be that evil.
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
Why, why minnie mouse?
During the last couple of weekends, I've spent a lot of time at various St John Ambulance duties.
While out there, fundraising and providing treatment I spent a not inconsiderable amount of time people watching.
And sewing and reading, but I'm talking about people today.
The one person I want to talk about was a girl. Perhaps 13, maybe...maybe 14. But I'm getting ahead of myself now.
Picture me at the Stilton Cheese Rolling, fundraising away. Alison waving a fluffy bunny at people.
But at that moment no one was biting, so I was drifting along with Plan B - watch people. People watching can take many forms - letting them drift by you, trying to identify families, determine relationships between groups....there's so many ways to pass the time.
I was playing guess the age. Look a person over, from head to toe (or toe to head, depending where you start) and try to guess how old they are based purely on what they're wearing and how they look.
This particular girl, I started on ankles and worked my way up. I can even remember what I thought as I ran my eyes over her.
Black two inch heels - a little impractical for the event...but not madly so. Might be after attention.
Black fishnet stockings/tights - probably very unsuitable for the event - it was 20+ degrees! Probably after attention.
Black thigh length mini skirt - Definitely after attention. Might be a goth...
Black slashed t-shirt, but a little tight - Ok, we have a goth! But not an adult one.
Usual goth make up on a cute face - hard to tell age, but less then 16...?
Pink Minnie Mouse hair band?
While out there, fundraising and providing treatment I spent a not inconsiderable amount of time people watching.
And sewing and reading, but I'm talking about people today.
The one person I want to talk about was a girl. Perhaps 13, maybe...maybe 14. But I'm getting ahead of myself now.
Picture me at the Stilton Cheese Rolling, fundraising away. Alison waving a fluffy bunny at people.
But at that moment no one was biting, so I was drifting along with Plan B - watch people. People watching can take many forms - letting them drift by you, trying to identify families, determine relationships between groups....there's so many ways to pass the time.
I was playing guess the age. Look a person over, from head to toe (or toe to head, depending where you start) and try to guess how old they are based purely on what they're wearing and how they look.
This particular girl, I started on ankles and worked my way up. I can even remember what I thought as I ran my eyes over her.
Black two inch heels - a little impractical for the event...but not madly so. Might be after attention.
Black fishnet stockings/tights - probably very unsuitable for the event - it was 20+ degrees! Probably after attention.
Black thigh length mini skirt - Definitely after attention. Might be a goth...
Black slashed t-shirt, but a little tight - Ok, we have a goth! But not an adult one.
Usual goth make up on a cute face - hard to tell age, but less then 16...?
Pink Minnie Mouse hair band?
Huh?!?
Minnie MOUSE?
Why, if you've gone out of your way to look like an adult goth, with all the associated props, why wear ANYTHING that's by Disney??
Saturday, May 10, 2008
Cooking and Cleaning
There are some of you out there who believe I can't clean a cup without threat of physical violence. That or a serious lack of tea.
Despite this there are others who believe that I'm a cleaning fanatic. Who have left me house sitting and come back to find the place vastly cleaner then when they left.
The truth is that I'm really like a pendulum. I'll let things slide until it might be a health risk - I do not enjoy food poisoning - and I'll blitz. So I've just spent an hour cleaning the kitchen - well, that bit I use - just so that I can start making it dirty again.
This is important - because of the way and what I'm cooking.
When the parents left I inherited a number of cold cuts - and today I'm eating the last. The problem is I don't know how old it is. Cooked chicken breast, that's been in the fridge for well...days. But it smells alright.
But to be on the safe side, it's in the oven right now. Diced and covered with a chicken stock - oxo based - with mushrooms, it's just boiling away now. Give it a minute or two, not long enough to over cook - and it'll be perfectly safe, if it wasn't already.
What's this got to do with cleaning? Because I'm playing with food that's got the slightest risk of being...well...old. So even if it was ok today, I won't do the clearing up till tuesday. So there's plenty of time for things to go wrong.
But hot, cooked chicken with ceaser salad sounds good - but I have a slightly barbaric twist. You remember that chicken stock I cooked the chicken and mushroom in?
I'm going to save that. Put it in a mug, let it cool over dinner...and it becomes a drink. Slightly fatty. A touch salty.
But all the favour of chicken in a meaty broth.
I'd better not tell mother....
Despite this there are others who believe that I'm a cleaning fanatic. Who have left me house sitting and come back to find the place vastly cleaner then when they left.
The truth is that I'm really like a pendulum. I'll let things slide until it might be a health risk - I do not enjoy food poisoning - and I'll blitz. So I've just spent an hour cleaning the kitchen - well, that bit I use - just so that I can start making it dirty again.
This is important - because of the way and what I'm cooking.
When the parents left I inherited a number of cold cuts - and today I'm eating the last. The problem is I don't know how old it is. Cooked chicken breast, that's been in the fridge for well...days. But it smells alright.
But to be on the safe side, it's in the oven right now. Diced and covered with a chicken stock - oxo based - with mushrooms, it's just boiling away now. Give it a minute or two, not long enough to over cook - and it'll be perfectly safe, if it wasn't already.
What's this got to do with cleaning? Because I'm playing with food that's got the slightest risk of being...well...old. So even if it was ok today, I won't do the clearing up till tuesday. So there's plenty of time for things to go wrong.
But hot, cooked chicken with ceaser salad sounds good - but I have a slightly barbaric twist. You remember that chicken stock I cooked the chicken and mushroom in?
I'm going to save that. Put it in a mug, let it cool over dinner...and it becomes a drink. Slightly fatty. A touch salty.
But all the favour of chicken in a meaty broth.
I'd better not tell mother....
Tuesday, May 6, 2008
This weekend
This weekend I've been enjoying that special form bliss associated with the visiting of relatives.
These are the relatives you've not seen in two or three years - and that's not just because you were out of the country.
No...thoughts of hunting them through the woods to the crack of rifle fire....of slowly dangling them over the abyss of doom and slowly sawing through the rope with a nail file while describing the horrors awaiting them at the bottom.
Yes, those relatives.
The kind of relatives which make you think that spending 8 hours on a fund raising duty in the full heat of summer isn't such a bad idea, ten miles away from them.
And maybe you should spend a few more hours there, just incase someone's feeling generous...
These are the relatives you've not seen in two or three years - and that's not just because you were out of the country.
No...thoughts of hunting them through the woods to the crack of rifle fire....of slowly dangling them over the abyss of doom and slowly sawing through the rope with a nail file while describing the horrors awaiting them at the bottom.
Yes, those relatives.
The kind of relatives which make you think that spending 8 hours on a fund raising duty in the full heat of summer isn't such a bad idea, ten miles away from them.
And maybe you should spend a few more hours there, just incase someone's feeling generous...
Sunday, May 4, 2008
Sunday
Evening all
Rather then comment on the recent elections - I'll save that for another day.
But I have found a solution to the D&D crisis. A druid/rogue, with a really odd obsession.
--
Now, at some point I'll talk about the insanity of work. But in the mean time, this joke reminds me of it at, sometimes...
Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says "OK, now what?"
Rather then comment on the recent elections - I'll save that for another day.
But I have found a solution to the D&D crisis. A druid/rogue, with a really odd obsession.
--
Now, at some point I'll talk about the insanity of work. But in the mean time, this joke reminds me of it at, sometimes...
Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says "OK, now what?"
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