Recently the culture secretary, a muppet by the name of Andy Burnham has been talking to the papers about inappropriate content on the internet. I'm just going to copy and paste a few things he's said (via the BBC, the Telegraph and The Register).
Because I believe the man should be stripped of any power - and for that matter, clothing - locked into a public stock in London and publicly humiliated for failing to understand a problem that's intrinsically related to his job.
Quote 1: "There is content that should just not be available to be viewed. That is my view. Absolutely categorical. This is not a campaign against free speech, far from it; it is simply there is a wider public interest at stake when it involves harm to other people."
Translation: There are somethings the public shouldn't be allowed to view, read or say. Because it may harm or upset people.
Now, correct me if I'm wrong, but that IS a freedom of speech issue. But a freedom of speech issue that's already addressed. There are laws against the related harm - child abuse, incitement and liable laws.
So what he wants to do is...ban things that aren't illegal. He later gives an example of "...which I would say is unacceptable. You can view a beheading."
Right, now correct me if I'm wrong, but what's the alternative? The beheading he's almost certainly talking about is something that happened in Iraq - a hostage was beheaded.
Such a thing is a gruesome act that will offend - in fact, this event was a message intended to upset. But in banning it what do we achieve? We can't hope to remove it from the internet and the only person it harms is the viewer.
Oh, wait, I forgot. Think of the children...
Quite: "Leaving your child for two hours completely unregulated on the internet is not something you can do. This isn't about turning the clock back. The internet has been empowering and democratising in many ways but we haven't yet got the stakes in the ground to help people navigate their way safely around."
Why in the name of green tomatoes are you leaving your impressionable children to browse the internet on their own?? Would you leave your child in the hands of strange people for 2 hours?
Nope - it's called supervising your children. Making sure they don't run into dangerous things is a part of responsible parenting.
More to the point, how are your precious little angels supposed to find this material? *Accidentally* search for "beheading infidel"? It's not something I'd imagine most children would look for.
The odds of children accidentally stumbling on something unsuitable is slim to none. Further more, the odds are that anything they stumble on will be passed by as boring.
We view things as unsuitable for children. But children...filter out things they don't find interesting. Actually, to be honest, most of us do. Which is why unless they're looking for something they're perfectly safe just web browsing.
The other side - how do we stop them looking at things. If a child wanted to get online and look at unsuitable things....do we think we could stop them?
Even if we had a "perfectly secure system" - we locked down the DNS system, prevented proxies, limited direct IP address lookups - it still wouldn't work.
Lets be clear - there is no practical technological fix to prevent access. Why do I say that? Because even outside the huge techie issues, there's a massive classification issue. What is a child allowed to see?
Quote: According to the Telegraph, Burnham's main goal is to compel ISPs to offer "child-safe" services.
Now, what's the problem with this? There are two main ways of filtering. You allow everything except things that have been complained about...or you allow only things that have been checked.
Now, the problem is simple. He wants the ISPs to pay for all this. Now, how many people do you expect this would take? People to check every blog, picture, site and video file. Oh, and remember that the content keeps changing.
Daily.
The answer is - lots. Paid for by ISPs. Now, since they are all private companies that means that the people who pay for it are us, the customers. So that isn't going to happen, because it can't. The one body that already does part of this job - the Internet Watch Foundation - yep, that should familiar - does what it can, but as recently shown is fundamentally incompetent.
A big enough staff to filter the internet is simply impossible.
So what we have here is a complete moron wringing his hands and saying "Oh, something must be done! Won't someone think of the children!!"
What he really should be doing is promoting the idea that parents should be careful in how they allow their children to be exposed to the collected thoughts, desires and idle mumblings of the human race. Because the internet isn't a pretty place.
Because humans aren't a very pretty people.
Monday, December 29, 2008
Sunday, December 28, 2008
Once again, the bombs fall
Once again in the land with the city holy to the three largest religions, bombs fall. Missiles whine and people die.
But here in the UK there seems to be a small, tiny - nay, microscopic bias in the reporting.
Yes, Israel are again bombing the life out of Gaza.
But Hamas launched rockets from the gaza strip first.
Now, it's not as clear cut as all that - it never is. They attacked us, we attcked them back. Remember that the attrocity we commit now is excused by what they did to us last time.
But what is clear is that this could all be ended very, very quickly. It's depressingly simple - if they would stop for 5 minutes to think about it.
Hamas can't win with military might. They launch rockets, Israel has nuclear weapons. (Probably.)
But if the rockets and the attacks stopped, so would the retaliation. Follow this up with non-violent protest. Ghandi had the right idea in India and its hugely difficult to fight - because there is nothing to fight.
But no.
You homo sapiens and your guns...
--
Yes, I know, I want a rifle. So shoot me.
But here in the UK there seems to be a small, tiny - nay, microscopic bias in the reporting.
Yes, Israel are again bombing the life out of Gaza.
But Hamas launched rockets from the gaza strip first.
Now, it's not as clear cut as all that - it never is. They attacked us, we attcked them back. Remember that the attrocity we commit now is excused by what they did to us last time.
But what is clear is that this could all be ended very, very quickly. It's depressingly simple - if they would stop for 5 minutes to think about it.
Hamas can't win with military might. They launch rockets, Israel has nuclear weapons. (Probably.)
But if the rockets and the attacks stopped, so would the retaliation. Follow this up with non-violent protest. Ghandi had the right idea in India and its hugely difficult to fight - because there is nothing to fight.
But no.
You homo sapiens and your guns...
--
Yes, I know, I want a rifle. So shoot me.
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
Why politics can make me angry
Broadly speaking I would hope that all politicians put their country first, then their party and only finaly themselves.
Ok, I admit if the last two were reversed I wouldn't mind to much.
Even so I accept that different political ideologies will do things I don't agree with - however, they are all doing what they think "is for the greater good".
This is why I'm rather angry with the current crop of labour politicians.
Right now we're going through a bit of a recession - as is much of the world. During this difficult time the labour parlimentry party hasn't been exactly...well...helpful.
But what really takes the biscuit is this sort of thing.
Rather then bail out a british company like woolworths, or spend a few billion reducing the employers contribution to national insurance - a tax on employing someone - they spend it on a car company.
A car company that was bought out by an indian firm a year or two back.
Not because it would be especialy bad for the economy - woolworths employs more people. Both have huge supply chains.
Nope - it's because the car company happens to have several thousand workers in a couple of margional labour seats.
Spending our tax money to buy votes.
But why is it needed? Surely the've already saved the world?
Ok, I admit if the last two were reversed I wouldn't mind to much.
Even so I accept that different political ideologies will do things I don't agree with - however, they are all doing what they think "is for the greater good".
This is why I'm rather angry with the current crop of labour politicians.
Right now we're going through a bit of a recession - as is much of the world. During this difficult time the labour parlimentry party hasn't been exactly...well...helpful.
But what really takes the biscuit is this sort of thing.
Rather then bail out a british company like woolworths, or spend a few billion reducing the employers contribution to national insurance - a tax on employing someone - they spend it on a car company.
A car company that was bought out by an indian firm a year or two back.
Not because it would be especialy bad for the economy - woolworths employs more people. Both have huge supply chains.
Nope - it's because the car company happens to have several thousand workers in a couple of margional labour seats.
Spending our tax money to buy votes.
But why is it needed? Surely the've already saved the world?
Saturday, December 20, 2008
Promised things
As some of you might remember, I promised to post a few comments that were made while I was in Canada.
If this offends anyone - I've taken out the worst ones. And I firmly believe that if god exists, s/he's got a sense of humour.
Now, to set the scene...
It's a catholic church, with a christening service going onin the background at the front. All in french...
Two warcraft players hiding at the back of the church.
Some of the more printable comments:
"Can you get instant quest text here?"
--
"Rep grinding with the catholic church...is there a daily quest?"
-
"How many points is a service worth? Is it extra on Sundays?"
--
"Are christenings repeatable?"
"Yes...but you need a rare quest drop."
--
"What do you get for being exalted here?"
"Excommunicated."
If this offends anyone - I've taken out the worst ones. And I firmly believe that if god exists, s/he's got a sense of humour.
Now, to set the scene...
It's a catholic church, with a christening service going on
Two warcraft players hiding at the back of the church.
Some of the more printable comments:
"Can you get instant quest text here?"
--
"Rep grinding with the catholic church...is there a daily quest?"
-
"How many points is a service worth? Is it extra on Sundays?"
--
"Are christenings repeatable?"
"Yes...but you need a rare quest drop."
--
"What do you get for being exalted here?"
"Excommunicated."
Friday, December 19, 2008
While I'm ill...
When I'm ill I have a very clear view of what I want to do.
Very little.
I want to stay warm, I want to be distracted and above all, I don't want to do anything that will last. Because five days later I'll look back at it and think "I could do better if I was blond. Look at the lines on that!!"
But believe it or not, playing on the computer (which you'd imagine fills most of the requirements) isn't the first thing on my list.
It's about 5th.
Sleeping in a nice warm bed comes in at 4th - although, to be honest, sleeping is usually on my top 20 list of things to do. So that's not a huge surprise.
Third on the list might surprise. It's not very often that I look at porn - because, well, I'm not a fan. But 3rd is being wrapped in a blanket, with a cat curled up on my lap, watching Car Porn.
Yep - I'm a not-so-closet Topgear fan. Available on "Dave" - the one non-news channel on digital TV worth watching in the day time.
(You lot have FILTHY minds!)
Curling continues the theme with two, although not with a cat. Because they're are things cats won't do. Or can't do.
I've never tried to get kessy to cook - worth a try, do you think?
But the thing I'd rather be doing - the item at the top of my list...isn't printable.
Not printable because...well...ok.
It starts with curling. And I'm not talking about THIS.
Very little.
I want to stay warm, I want to be distracted and above all, I don't want to do anything that will last. Because five days later I'll look back at it and think "I could do better if I was blond. Look at the lines on that!!"
But believe it or not, playing on the computer (which you'd imagine fills most of the requirements) isn't the first thing on my list.
It's about 5th.
Sleeping in a nice warm bed comes in at 4th - although, to be honest, sleeping is usually on my top 20 list of things to do. So that's not a huge surprise.
Third on the list might surprise. It's not very often that I look at porn - because, well, I'm not a fan. But 3rd is being wrapped in a blanket, with a cat curled up on my lap, watching Car Porn.
Yep - I'm a not-so-closet Topgear fan. Available on "Dave" - the one non-news channel on digital TV worth watching in the day time.
(You lot have FILTHY minds!)
Curling continues the theme with two, although not with a cat. Because they're are things cats won't do. Or can't do.
I've never tried to get kessy to cook - worth a try, do you think?
But the thing I'd rather be doing - the item at the top of my list...isn't printable.
Not printable because...well...ok.
It starts with curling. And I'm not talking about THIS.
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
It was a mistake...
Post edited to fix html like elements being hidden
Today I had the task of visiting a nurse we have based in a school - shockingly, she's the school nurse.
So I wondered over to reception and asked for her by name - and this is how the conversation went...
Me: Hi, I'm here to see Jane Doe?
Receptionist: I'll let her know you're here. What's your name?
Me: Me? I'm [My Name]
Receptionist: [phones] Heya....got some one here for you........I didn't ask...one min...
Receptionist: What form are you in?
Me: I don't go to school here.
Receptionist: Why don't you go to your own school's nurse?
Me: [blinks]
Me: Could you please tell her that the technician from [company], [my name] is her to see her?
Receptionist: [shakes head slowly]
Me: [hands over company ID]
Receptionist: Oh. I'll tell her. Arn't you a bit young to-
Me: No. I'm old enough to legally have a child in this school. So please, just get her.
The mistake I made?
Shaving.
Today I had the task of visiting a nurse we have based in a school - shockingly, she's the school nurse.
So I wondered over to reception and asked for her by name - and this is how the conversation went...
Me: Hi, I'm here to see Jane Doe?
Receptionist: I'll let her know you're here. What's your name?
Me: Me? I'm [My Name]
Receptionist: [phones] Heya....got some one here for you....
Receptionist: What form are you in?
Me: I don't go to school here.
Receptionist: Why don't you go to your own school's nurse?
Me: [blinks]
Me: Could you please tell her that the technician from [company], [my name] is her to see her?
Receptionist: [shakes head slowly]
Me: [hands over company ID]
Receptionist: Oh. I'll tell her. Arn't you a bit young to-
Me: No. I'm old enough to legally have a child in this school. So please, just get her.
The mistake I made?
Shaving.
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
I don't believe it...
While writing the previous post I used (or nearly used, but edited out - I'm not going hunting for it now!) a reference to a rubber duck fetish.
I did this by trying to think of the most unlikely thing I could think of.
However, on googling "rubber duck fetish" I came up with about 363,000 pages.
I really did choke on my tea.
The other potentially unlikely thing I mentioned was a women wrapped in Christmas paper.
I'm not sure I'm brave enough to look.
I did this by trying to think of the most unlikely thing I could think of.
However, on googling "rubber duck fetish" I came up with about 363,000 pages.
I really did choke on my tea.
The other potentially unlikely thing I mentioned was a women wrapped in Christmas paper.
I'm not sure I'm brave enough to look.
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
But think of the children!
I'm all in favour of protecting children from some things.
As far as I'm concerned a child should never have to fear abuse, unwelcome sexual attention or violence.
But then, I'd say the same thing about adults as well.
Lets be clear - for the record - that no child should ever be sexually involved with an adult, willingly or not - who is more a couple of years their senior.
A willing sixteen and fifteen year old? It's impossible to stop - and not something we should try to stop. That sort of age gap appears within a school year. Seventeen and fifteen....hmmm... - but you see my point.
However, where I differ in opinion with some others is the issue of images. Take for example, this.
In this case an encyclopedia has been censored for perhaps 90% of UK internet users - wikipedia, the 4th most visited site on the planet - censored.
Not because of a new image, but an old one. A thirty year old album cover.
For those who haven't seen it, it's of a naked girl in (what in an older, more developed person) would be considered a provocative pose. Naked - but with a broken glass type effect concealing certain things.
It's certainly indecent, uninteresting and in very poor taste - but if the Internet Watch Foundation hadn't done anything then it would have been consigned to the dustbins of history. Instead it's now wikipedia's most popular page.
But no. Instead, they classified it as an "potentially illegal indecent image of a child hosted outside the UK". Which I have a problem with.
You see, there have been laws in the UK for a long time - a very long time. For the last couple of hundred years there have been assorted crimes and penalties for obscene publications.
This album cover was released in the UK and is still available.
So let's get be clear - this picture, taken with consent of the child (And I would imagine the parents!) has had 30+ years to upset people. It did manage to upset people.
In a couple of countries it was re-released with a different cover - but not because of legality. Because it's tasteless.
This album cover was taken to the FBI back in May - but they did nothing. Because there's nothing bad about it. No child was hurt in any way, doesn't really depict anything.
It's not an illegal picture. Or hasn't been so far.
But no. The IWF put it on the banned list, causing a host of other problems...because it Might Be illegal.
This angers me for two reasons. Firstly, because if you start banning encyclopedias from showing things it's easy to start with things like this picture...then where do you stop?
The very far end of this would be banning any picture of women, dressed, undressed or wrapped in Christmas paper. Why? Because there's a religion (Islam) who believes that the sight of a women who's not drapped in thick, shapeless cloth is Indecent and Might Drive Men Into Wild Rape Rampages.
(Oh, just think of the poor women, attacked by these provoked men, Hide them, for their own good!)
And the other reason? To find an image like the one recently banned sexually interesting requires a very sick mind. To someone like that, walking past a school, looking at the pictures in a teenagers magazine or watching children's TV could be as exciting.
You can't stop that.
They need help.
Banning cover art from an album from thirty years ago really isn't going to do it. It was still available (with a better, higher quality image) on amazon and the band's website, as well as hundreds of other sites, mirrors and caches.
Do something about people who actualy abuse children to create images. Track down and throw the book at anyone who pays for this sort of material.*
But address the problem we have NOW. Help children NOW.
Don't take action about a picture that even the girl involved with was happy about, then and 15 years later.
Protect children - not "The Children".
--
1) Let the flaming commence
*) I could make an argument against this. But another day.
As far as I'm concerned a child should never have to fear abuse, unwelcome sexual attention or violence.
But then, I'd say the same thing about adults as well.
Lets be clear - for the record - that no child should ever be sexually involved with an adult, willingly or not - who is more a couple of years their senior.
A willing sixteen and fifteen year old? It's impossible to stop - and not something we should try to stop. That sort of age gap appears within a school year. Seventeen and fifteen....hmmm... - but you see my point.
However, where I differ in opinion with some others is the issue of images. Take for example, this.
In this case an encyclopedia has been censored for perhaps 90% of UK internet users - wikipedia, the 4th most visited site on the planet - censored.
Not because of a new image, but an old one. A thirty year old album cover.
For those who haven't seen it, it's of a naked girl in (what in an older, more developed person) would be considered a provocative pose. Naked - but with a broken glass type effect concealing certain things.
It's certainly indecent, uninteresting and in very poor taste - but if the Internet Watch Foundation hadn't done anything then it would have been consigned to the dustbins of history. Instead it's now wikipedia's most popular page.
But no. Instead, they classified it as an "potentially illegal indecent image of a child hosted outside the UK". Which I have a problem with.
You see, there have been laws in the UK for a long time - a very long time. For the last couple of hundred years there have been assorted crimes and penalties for obscene publications.
This album cover was released in the UK and is still available.
So let's get be clear - this picture, taken with consent of the child (And I would imagine the parents!) has had 30+ years to upset people. It did manage to upset people.
In a couple of countries it was re-released with a different cover - but not because of legality. Because it's tasteless.
This album cover was taken to the FBI back in May - but they did nothing. Because there's nothing bad about it. No child was hurt in any way, doesn't really depict anything.
It's not an illegal picture. Or hasn't been so far.
But no. The IWF put it on the banned list, causing a host of other problems...because it Might Be illegal.
This angers me for two reasons. Firstly, because if you start banning encyclopedias from showing things it's easy to start with things like this picture...then where do you stop?
The very far end of this would be banning any picture of women, dressed, undressed or wrapped in Christmas paper. Why? Because there's a religion (Islam) who believes that the sight of a women who's not drapped in thick, shapeless cloth is Indecent and Might Drive Men Into Wild Rape Rampages.
(Oh, just think of the poor women, attacked by these provoked men, Hide them, for their own good!)
And the other reason? To find an image like the one recently banned sexually interesting requires a very sick mind. To someone like that, walking past a school, looking at the pictures in a teenagers magazine or watching children's TV could be as exciting.
You can't stop that.
They need help.
Banning cover art from an album from thirty years ago really isn't going to do it. It was still available (with a better, higher quality image) on amazon and the band's website, as well as hundreds of other sites, mirrors and caches.
Do something about people who actualy abuse children to create images. Track down and throw the book at anyone who pays for this sort of material.*
But address the problem we have NOW. Help children NOW.
Don't take action about a picture that even the girl involved with was happy about, then and 15 years later.
Protect children - not "The Children".
--
1) Let the flaming commence
*) I could make an argument against this. But another day.
Sunday, December 7, 2008
Monday, December 1, 2008
Why child protection laws don't work
Tonight, I ended up drifting over to my not-so-local cadet group that I'm loosely attached to. (Don't ask why....)
Anyway, turned out there was a Surprise Child Protection Inspection.
Yay.
Now, it's the last week of rehearsal for a pantomime they're putting on for the parents, friends and others - anyone they can drag there. So it was the dress rehearsal.
The panto is beauty and the beast - and Beauty was there in her dress. Now, I know I'm a sucker for a girl in a dress - always have been, probably always will be.
But my favourite cadet - (yep, I have a favourite - so shoot me. She reminds me in a way of me - that same ability to jump around and have three different conversations at the same time with the same person. ) - turns up looking Good in a dress.
If the child protection people were not there, I'd of told her that she looked good. Because, well, she did. (Yes, she's 10 years younger then me - I'm just saying she looked good. Shhessh, you lot have dirty minds.) And none of the cadets complimented her.
But the rehearsal came to an end, and she walked home in the rain in that dress.
If it wasn't for the child protection people, I'd have arranged matters so that she'd be driven home. Me, mother, another parent - because while the Village is mostly safe you never know who's out there.
And a dress like that pulls the attention of most males over the age of 15.
I'd have escorted her home myself, if needs be. In the rain.
But, no. Child protection.
Grrrr.
Anyway, turned out there was a Surprise Child Protection Inspection.
Yay.
Now, it's the last week of rehearsal for a pantomime they're putting on for the parents, friends and others - anyone they can drag there. So it was the dress rehearsal.
The panto is beauty and the beast - and Beauty was there in her dress. Now, I know I'm a sucker for a girl in a dress - always have been, probably always will be.
But my favourite cadet - (yep, I have a favourite - so shoot me. She reminds me in a way of me - that same ability to jump around and have three different conversations at the same time with the same person. ) - turns up looking Good in a dress.
If the child protection people were not there, I'd of told her that she looked good. Because, well, she did. (Yes, she's 10 years younger then me - I'm just saying she looked good. Shhessh, you lot have dirty minds.) And none of the cadets complimented her.
But the rehearsal came to an end, and she walked home in the rain in that dress.
If it wasn't for the child protection people, I'd have arranged matters so that she'd be driven home. Me, mother, another parent - because while the Village is mostly safe you never know who's out there.
And a dress like that pulls the attention of most males over the age of 15.
I'd have escorted her home myself, if needs be. In the rain.
But, no. Child protection.
Grrrr.
Friday, November 28, 2008
Luddite
I'm not a Luddite by any stretch of the imagination.
I work in IT. I can program in a couple of languages. I've own more computing power then most of the early space missions added together.
But I'm frightened of facebook.
I log into my facebook account so rarely that it's hardly worth having it.
My fear isn't over the nature of the beast - I have no real secrets to hide. There's a few things that might embarrass me perhaps. But nothing that would hugely surprise anyone.
It's not even a worry over the nature of social networking sites in general - I don't have a great fear of identity theft or anything like that.
No - it's the requests.
I have something like 270 requests right now. That's right...two hundred and seventy requests to do everything from be people's friend to indulge in a pirate game.
People wanting me to do things. It's enough to make me want to go and hide.
*Ducks his head under a blanket. A blue blanket*
I work in IT. I can program in a couple of languages. I've own more computing power then most of the early space missions added together.
But I'm frightened of facebook.
I log into my facebook account so rarely that it's hardly worth having it.
My fear isn't over the nature of the beast - I have no real secrets to hide. There's a few things that might embarrass me perhaps. But nothing that would hugely surprise anyone.
It's not even a worry over the nature of social networking sites in general - I don't have a great fear of identity theft or anything like that.
No - it's the requests.
I have something like 270 requests right now. That's right...two hundred and seventy requests to do everything from be people's friend to indulge in a pirate game.
People wanting me to do things. It's enough to make me want to go and hide.
*Ducks his head under a blanket. A blue blanket*
Thursday, November 27, 2008
Double glazing salesman...
We're looking at replacing some windows - mainly because they're Old, the glazing is going and....well...this is mother....and decorating...
But because I was hanging around, I decided to help with the math.
You know me. Helpful to the last.
I don't think the salesman really appreciates this though.
Where is the possible harm in a quick spreadsheet?
But because I was hanging around, I decided to help with the math.
You know me. Helpful to the last.
I don't think the salesman really appreciates this though.
Where is the possible harm in a quick spreadsheet?
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Fairness...
For those who follow the UK news, we've just had the "Pre-Budget Report". This a time when the governing party gets to alter it's predicted economic statistics, maybe tweak things a little.
In this one, they tweaked lots, to the tune of billions.
All the time, talking about fairness. But really - what is fairness?
Imagine three brothers sitting there, watching a film. They've got a bucket of popcorn to share.
The simplest and "fairest" way would be to divide it into three bowels, meaning each gets an equal portion and can do what they like with it. Salt it, butter it, add toffee or throw it at the TV.
Another "fair" way to go would be to divide it up based on who likes popcorn more. Little Paul there doesn't like it...so give him a small handful and about HALF for me and thee. Yay!!
Or we can go by need - give the most to the hungry one, a little to the one who's just stuffed himself with chocolate and a middling amount to the guy in the middle.
Perhaps though we should look at the ability to buy more. The middle brother has a job, so he's got the most money - he gets the least. The young one gets next to no pocket money, so he gets most...and the old brother, who's into girls and goths get a moderate amount.
Perhaps though we should look at effort - it was the eldest who arranged a movie and got the popcorn - the most deserving. It was the middle brother who throw it into the microwave...and the younger brother dancing around under everybodies feet singing "Bang bang, he shot me down..." as it popped - clearly doing nothing to help, so he should get the merest crumbs.
All of theses are "fair" - from a certain point of view.
Fairness is purely, simply defined from your own moral code.
So sitting there, listening to politicians using that word - fair - I'm always hit by the fact that it doesn't mean "fair" in the sense you, me and the garden gnome means it.
To them, it means "The way I want it to be."
The gits.
In this one, they tweaked lots, to the tune of billions.
All the time, talking about fairness. But really - what is fairness?
Imagine three brothers sitting there, watching a film. They've got a bucket of popcorn to share.
The simplest and "fairest" way would be to divide it into three bowels, meaning each gets an equal portion and can do what they like with it. Salt it, butter it, add toffee or throw it at the TV.
Another "fair" way to go would be to divide it up based on who likes popcorn more. Little Paul there doesn't like it...so give him a small handful and about HALF for me and thee. Yay!!
Or we can go by need - give the most to the hungry one, a little to the one who's just stuffed himself with chocolate and a middling amount to the guy in the middle.
Perhaps though we should look at the ability to buy more. The middle brother has a job, so he's got the most money - he gets the least. The young one gets next to no pocket money, so he gets most...and the old brother, who's into girls and goths get a moderate amount.
Perhaps though we should look at effort - it was the eldest who arranged a movie and got the popcorn - the most deserving. It was the middle brother who throw it into the microwave...and the younger brother dancing around under everybodies feet singing "Bang bang, he shot me down..." as it popped - clearly doing nothing to help, so he should get the merest crumbs.
All of theses are "fair" - from a certain point of view.
Fairness is purely, simply defined from your own moral code.
So sitting there, listening to politicians using that word - fair - I'm always hit by the fact that it doesn't mean "fair" in the sense you, me and the garden gnome means it.
To them, it means "The way I want it to be."
The gits.
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Two (and a half) good programs a year?
I'm sitting here watching the start of this years second series on BBC television this year that might, actually, possibly maybe worth watching.
I'm seriously starting to question the value of the BBC TV License Fee. Is it really worth it...?
Doctor Who is worth watching...some of the time. Unfortunately the last season or two has been marred by the choice of companion. And now they're changing the Dr. So it's being demoted to a half.
Top gear remains entertaining every episode, with a mix of irreverent and lunatic antics. A seven hundred and fifty mile race on one tank of fuel - with the drivers picking the cars was tonight's treat.
And the final program - Survivors.
Maybe.
A remake of a classic 1970's program about The End of The World - pretty much one of my favourite story premises. The first episode is a little slow - we're 45 minutes and and I don't believe I've missed much, even though I've been surfing the net and typing this.
But then, what kills everyone really isn't the bit that interests me. True, I can pick a number of holes in the opening scenario. The progression of diseases - method of death is presented as auto-immune - quick - bonus points for anyone listing treatments that might help. (Yes, I said help, not cure).
But much of this is probably to simplify the start - limitations I'm willing to accept for a good story.
But it's not the ending of the world that interests me - it's what happens after...
I'm seriously starting to question the value of the BBC TV License Fee. Is it really worth it...?
Doctor Who is worth watching...some of the time. Unfortunately the last season or two has been marred by the choice of companion. And now they're changing the Dr. So it's being demoted to a half.
Top gear remains entertaining every episode, with a mix of irreverent and lunatic antics. A seven hundred and fifty mile race on one tank of fuel - with the drivers picking the cars was tonight's treat.
And the final program - Survivors.
Maybe.
A remake of a classic 1970's program about The End of The World - pretty much one of my favourite story premises. The first episode is a little slow - we're 45 minutes and and I don't believe I've missed much, even though I've been surfing the net and typing this.
But then, what kills everyone really isn't the bit that interests me. True, I can pick a number of holes in the opening scenario. The progression of diseases - method of death is presented as auto-immune - quick - bonus points for anyone listing treatments that might help. (Yes, I said help, not cure).
But much of this is probably to simplify the start - limitations I'm willing to accept for a good story.
But it's not the ending of the world that interests me - it's what happens after...
Friday, November 21, 2008
I'm leaving on a jet plane...
Note: Posted the next day..
--
Once again, I'm at an air port.
As per usual, my laptop was the object of close scrutiny, being x-rayed, chemically tested and turned on. But that's not what I'm writing about today.
I've seen many people object to queues. The old, the young. The disabled...mothers with babies, the blind and the blonde.
Today, I saw the religious.
In the check in queues of madness a man stormed to the front of the "Passengers in need of aid" queue. This was a separate queue, for those with Issues - the disabled and the like.
This didn't stop him. Clad in plain, stark black, with hat and two carts of luggage - enough for three normal people - 3 bags of check in, an hand luggage, a personal bag, even a hat box...
He was Jewish - clearly Jewish. An important Rabbi, no less. This was no guess...
For you see, his flight left in two hours. He not only told the person on the desk. He told me, the floor, the walls, the people on the other side of the building this, in a strong and strident voice. "I am an important Rabbi" he said, "It is imperative that I be taken to my flight at once! It leaves in just two hours and I must bless the plane at once, for the safety and salvation of all who fly upon her".
This continued for some minutes, while he invoked God, Humanity and..something in yiddish...to allow him through.
This took some time, while the poor desk girl (short, young brunette for the curious) just sat there, listening to the torrent of words.
When he seemed to pause for breath, she was ready.
"I'd be happy to escort you to your departure gate my self sir...in just a few minutes. First though sir..." (as she got up and walked a few yards) "....the queue starts here".
She got my applause.
--
Once again, I'm at an air port.
As per usual, my laptop was the object of close scrutiny, being x-rayed, chemically tested and turned on. But that's not what I'm writing about today.
I've seen many people object to queues. The old, the young. The disabled...mothers with babies, the blind and the blonde.
Today, I saw the religious.
In the check in queues of madness a man stormed to the front of the "Passengers in need of aid" queue. This was a separate queue, for those with Issues - the disabled and the like.
This didn't stop him. Clad in plain, stark black, with hat and two carts of luggage - enough for three normal people - 3 bags of check in, an hand luggage, a personal bag, even a hat box...
He was Jewish - clearly Jewish. An important Rabbi, no less. This was no guess...
For you see, his flight left in two hours. He not only told the person on the desk. He told me, the floor, the walls, the people on the other side of the building this, in a strong and strident voice. "I am an important Rabbi" he said, "It is imperative that I be taken to my flight at once! It leaves in just two hours and I must bless the plane at once, for the safety and salvation of all who fly upon her".
This continued for some minutes, while he invoked God, Humanity and..something in yiddish...to allow him through.
This took some time, while the poor desk girl (short, young brunette for the curious) just sat there, listening to the torrent of words.
When he seemed to pause for breath, she was ready.
"I'd be happy to escort you to your departure gate my self sir...in just a few minutes. First though sir..." (as she got up and walked a few yards) "....the queue starts here".
She got my applause.
Monday, November 17, 2008
Wow
Things that are missed...
As you might have noticed from some of the comments that have been left around here the expansion of the World of Warcraft has been released, again.
And, once again, I've missed the "fun" that this heralds.
No, really. "Fun" is appropriate.
Why do I say that?
Well, let's see. The first person to level from 70 to 80 (the new limit) did so in 27 hours.
Yep - that's right. They played for 27 hours, locked away from all normal distractions (like sleep, other people and sunlight) to obsessively level a character to the limit.
But where's the fun in this?
Or there's the queues...back in the "bad old days" on my server there used to be queues on a daily basis - and it wasn't fun. You logged on, having to wait 20 or 30 minutes to actualy get through the front door. Perhaps a hundred or two people...
Now it's simply madness. Queues of people seven hundred long just to log on. Having to wait so long that I could - yep, I, Me, the obsessive fan of long hot showers - could go for a run of a couple of miles, shower and get changed, make a cup of tea and sit back down at the computer.
And it still wouldn't be ready yet.
Or then there's the starting zones. Here again the problem is people. If you have a quest to kill Some-Nasty-Git, everyone will want to do it at some point.
Because it's the expansion there's hundreds of people wanting to kill Some-Nasty-Git at the same time. These people won't want to queue nicely...touched with the same madness that twisted the mind of the 27 hours guy, they will surge forwards to slay him as fast as possible themselves.
The result is chaos.
When I play a computer game I want to play it for fun. When I get back to England, the expansion might begin to be fun...perhaps.
Maybe.
As you might have noticed from some of the comments that have been left around here the expansion of the World of Warcraft has been released, again.
And, once again, I've missed the "fun" that this heralds.
No, really. "Fun" is appropriate.
Why do I say that?
Well, let's see. The first person to level from 70 to 80 (the new limit) did so in 27 hours.
Yep - that's right. They played for 27 hours, locked away from all normal distractions (like sleep, other people and sunlight) to obsessively level a character to the limit.
But where's the fun in this?
Or there's the queues...back in the "bad old days" on my server there used to be queues on a daily basis - and it wasn't fun. You logged on, having to wait 20 or 30 minutes to actualy get through the front door. Perhaps a hundred or two people...
Now it's simply madness. Queues of people seven hundred long just to log on. Having to wait so long that I could - yep, I, Me, the obsessive fan of long hot showers - could go for a run of a couple of miles, shower and get changed, make a cup of tea and sit back down at the computer.
And it still wouldn't be ready yet.
Or then there's the starting zones. Here again the problem is people. If you have a quest to kill Some-Nasty-Git, everyone will want to do it at some point.
Because it's the expansion there's hundreds of people wanting to kill Some-Nasty-Git at the same time. These people won't want to queue nicely...touched with the same madness that twisted the mind of the 27 hours guy, they will surge forwards to slay him as fast as possible themselves.
The result is chaos.
When I play a computer game I want to play it for fun. When I get back to England, the expansion might begin to be fun...perhaps.
Maybe.
Saturday, November 15, 2008
Hand me the garlic bread and no one gets hurt
Morning all
This evening (last night?) we went out for a meal, because, well, it's better then me (attempting) to cook something.
We ended up in "The Keg", which specialises in steak and ribs. The steak was wonderful....soft, juicy...still bleeding just the right amount. So thick that they claim they can't cook it any further then medium rare!
I should apologise to the vegetarians among you...but I'm not. It tasted too good.
The baked potato that accompanied it was dreamy - buttery, with just the right amount of salt for taste, but enough to start a doctor frothing at the mouth, babbling about blood pressure and cholesterol.
A Caesar salad with enough cheese, bacon and crispy bits to feed a starving African child for a week - and that's before he starts on the leaves.
But the best part - no question - was the garlic bread.
This wasn't just some bread with garlic butter.
It was warm and tender, crust slightly crunchy. Garlic suffused the butter, the bread...the cheese topping was made with three different cheeses you could pick out separately, each melting into the others arms like a trio of lovers, all melding as one into-
No, stop there.
Children might read this.
But hand me the garlic bread and no one gets hurt!
This evening (last night?) we went out for a meal, because, well, it's better then me (attempting) to cook something.
We ended up in "The Keg", which specialises in steak and ribs. The steak was wonderful....soft, juicy...still bleeding just the right amount. So thick that they claim they can't cook it any further then medium rare!
I should apologise to the vegetarians among you...but I'm not. It tasted too good.
The baked potato that accompanied it was dreamy - buttery, with just the right amount of salt for taste, but enough to start a doctor frothing at the mouth, babbling about blood pressure and cholesterol.
A Caesar salad with enough cheese, bacon and crispy bits to feed a starving African child for a week - and that's before he starts on the leaves.
But the best part - no question - was the garlic bread.
This wasn't just some bread with garlic butter.
It was warm and tender, crust slightly crunchy. Garlic suffused the butter, the bread...the cheese topping was made with three different cheeses you could pick out separately, each melting into the others arms like a trio of lovers, all melding as one into-
No, stop there.
Children might read this.
But hand me the garlic bread and no one gets hurt!
Thursday, November 13, 2008
Numbers
Numbers are simple.
Numbers are predictable - roll 2 dice a hundred times - a thousand times - and they fall in a statistically predictable pattern.
Today, while Isabelle had to go to work I played Settlers of Catan - now, I've played this before...once....such a long, long time ago that I couldn't even remember the rules properly...
Still - it's a fun game - it really is. Good enough that if we manage to arrange a Christmas Meal this year I'll pick it up and the expansion.
A game of diplomacy and cunning. Well, mostly.
Only catch is I might have to relax a little...too much obsessing over probability really doesn't make for a fun game. A winning game...
..but not a fun one.
Numbers are predictable - roll 2 dice a hundred times - a thousand times - and they fall in a statistically predictable pattern.
Today, while Isabelle had to go to work I played Settlers of Catan - now, I've played this before...once....such a long, long time ago that I couldn't even remember the rules properly...
Still - it's a fun game - it really is. Good enough that if we manage to arrange a Christmas Meal this year I'll pick it up and the expansion.
A game of diplomacy and cunning. Well, mostly.
Only catch is I might have to relax a little...too much obsessing over probability really doesn't make for a fun game. A winning game...
..but not a fun one.
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Rituals of life
When we do things in our daily lives we often tend to do them without thinking.
We build up a form of ritual - the way that things should be done, beyond which we feel uncomfortable. While there might be no significance to them - we can't help ourselves.
An example...take filling the car with petrol.
Pull up and park, remove the cap, pour in the fuel - so far, so normal.
But - when do you stop? When do you say "Yep, that's a full tank"?
I always fill it up till the pump stops...wait a second...then do so again. Until that second click of the pump, a moment after pulling on the lever - it's not done. That extra few cubic inches of gas...
Even then the ritual isn't done. Before I can leave I must - yes, must - work out the MPG of my last tank, reset the trip meter and drive away.
A simple task, transformed to mindless ritual...
And yes Dad, please do fill up the car...
We build up a form of ritual - the way that things should be done, beyond which we feel uncomfortable. While there might be no significance to them - we can't help ourselves.
An example...take filling the car with petrol.
Pull up and park, remove the cap, pour in the fuel - so far, so normal.
But - when do you stop? When do you say "Yep, that's a full tank"?
I always fill it up till the pump stops...wait a second...then do so again. Until that second click of the pump, a moment after pulling on the lever - it's not done. That extra few cubic inches of gas...
Even then the ritual isn't done. Before I can leave I must - yes, must - work out the MPG of my last tank, reset the trip meter and drive away.
A simple task, transformed to mindless ritual...
And yes Dad, please do fill up the car...
Saturday, November 8, 2008
Everywhere you go...
Up until now I've had no complaints what so ever with the weather.
It's been sunny and warm almost all the time - the worse was when it was misty and cool...which wasn't that bad.
But we decide to go to a museum - honest to good tourist behaviour - and it rains, and rains and rains.
The temptation to crawl back into bed...
It's been sunny and warm almost all the time - the worse was when it was misty and cool...which wasn't that bad.
But we decide to go to a museum - honest to good tourist behaviour - and it rains, and rains and rains.
The temptation to crawl back into bed...
Quick post
Please note that the post mentioned below was finally published and is below this one. Don't ask me why...
This is not the intended post for today - but I'm waiting on a pair of photos before releasing the already written one - so this will have to do.
It's about fuel. In the UK we feel hard done by if petrol costs more then, say, £1/litre. Here, they are breathing a sigh of relief, now that prices have dropped below $1.20 Canadian.
Take a deep breath people.
Calm down.
It gets worse.
Prices are now about $0.90/litre in the morning here, which is about 45p. Hey - you at the back - stop frothing at the mouth.
Relax. Chill.
It gets even worse.
Because here there is actual competition for customers. Just in case you didn't know (as there really doesn't seem to be much of in the UK - certainly not from where I'm standing!) competition is where you lower prices and offer other incentives to come buy the fuel here, rather then over there.
But here? Here prices drop by the hour....it drops from about 90 cents in the morning to (lowest seen yet) 80.2 cents per litre. This goes on till the next morning, where it jumps up.
A bit.
This morning, I saw 82 cents or so - at 8am. That would cost me £18 to fill my fuel tank.
From bone dry. Compared to about £39.
Goes looking for some emigration paperwork
This is not the intended post for today - but I'm waiting on a pair of photos before releasing the already written one - so this will have to do.
It's about fuel. In the UK we feel hard done by if petrol costs more then, say, £1/litre. Here, they are breathing a sigh of relief, now that prices have dropped below $1.20 Canadian.
Take a deep breath people.
Calm down.
It gets worse.
Prices are now about $0.90/litre in the morning here, which is about 45p. Hey - you at the back - stop frothing at the mouth.
Relax. Chill.
It gets even worse.
Because here there is actual competition for customers. Just in case you didn't know (as there really doesn't seem to be much of in the UK - certainly not from where I'm standing!) competition is where you lower prices and offer other incentives to come buy the fuel here, rather then over there.
But here? Here prices drop by the hour....it drops from about 90 cents in the morning to (lowest seen yet) 80.2 cents per litre. This goes on till the next morning, where it jumps up.
A bit.
This morning, I saw 82 cents or so - at 8am. That would cost me £18 to fill my fuel tank.
From bone dry. Compared to about £39.
Goes looking for some emigration paperwork
Friday, November 7, 2008
Visitations
There are many upsides to staying with a friend whist on holiday.
The most minor of fringe benefits are beyond their weight in gold - knowing where to go, transport....introductions to others...
But here in also lies a risk you must face - the chance, however small, that they may introduce you to a friend.
This friend, however likeable or personable stands a chance - tiny, perhaps - of having dedicated their life to a Purpose. A Purpose that cries for attention every day.
A Purpose that can destroy sleep night after night.
A Purpose that needs to be shown: Marie-lyne
...and Aryanne.
Of course, any such visit may end without incident. There's a good chance that they might not trust a relative stranger to hold their only child.
You never know if he might drop it.
Or use duct tape in some strange and twisted way, to ensure peace while he drinks his tea.
But sometimes, sometimes an unreasoning trust can develop. Ignoring all reason and experience they might trust their child to someone who hasn't held a baby in the last 10 years.
Someone like me...
Monday, November 3, 2008
Of all the things to talk about...
Today for a few minutes, I logged into warcraft.
Yes, I know I'm on holiday. That I should be relaxing and enjoying myself...well, I am. But that's not what I want to talk about.
On both sides - horde and alliance, they asked me the same question...everyone, asking the same question.
Of all the things they could ask..."How's the weather" - I just find this....disapointing....
--
NB - Even I'm capable of being sensible. No, really. Me, sensible.
Instead of carrying away with me to Canada my token that generates my minute by minute code, without which my accont is useless....I left it behind me in the UK.
And took the code off my account for a few weeks.
Yes, I know I'm on holiday. That I should be relaxing and enjoying myself...well, I am. But that's not what I want to talk about.
On both sides - horde and alliance, they asked me the same question...everyone, asking the same question.
Of all the things they could ask..."How's the weather" - I just find this....disapointing....
--
NB - Even I'm capable of being sensible. No, really. Me, sensible.
Instead of carrying away with me to Canada my token that generates my minute by minute code, without which my accont is useless....I left it behind me in the UK.
And took the code off my account for a few weeks.
Sunday, November 2, 2008
Oh, the pain
There are many downsides to traveling.
You can get lost.
You can loose your luggage.
You can accidentally get on the wrong plane and end up in, say, Afghanistan.
True - I admit, this last one might be a challenge. The airport staff will probably notice. But I'm sure it could be done...
But of all of these, there is something worse.
Worse then uncertainty, doubt, having no toothbrush and crazed UN peacekeepers trying to deal with a tourist in a warzone. Sorry, peacekeeping zone.
No - it's when you look out the window at 0630, knowing that you should be asleep.
But also knowing it's 1130 and that sleeping, now, is as likely as G. W. Bush apologising for being as intelligent as his namesake.
Its the headache that crys out "Oh, for a few hours of sleep. Ten of them - whole, peaceful hours of sleep". At 1500.
Oh...jetlag.
Of course, if you're sensible you can fight this killer of joy. You can sleep on planes. You can arrange your flights to try and avoid it.
Which is fine, if there isn't a damned 8 year old sitting next to it's 3 year old demon sibling - you can image, this works fine...for about 30 seconds. Ok. Maybe 2 minutes.
Now imagine this fight continuing for some 7 hours, with the occasional cease fire, cry in their suffering mothers arms and blessed silence as they stuff their tiny faces with more E Numbers then you can shake an equation at.
Oh, jet lag.
I would wish it on my worst enemy.
Happily. They can have mine!
You can get lost.
You can loose your luggage.
You can accidentally get on the wrong plane and end up in, say, Afghanistan.
True - I admit, this last one might be a challenge. The airport staff will probably notice. But I'm sure it could be done...
But of all of these, there is something worse.
Worse then uncertainty, doubt, having no toothbrush and crazed UN peacekeepers trying to deal with a tourist in a warzone. Sorry, peacekeeping zone.
No - it's when you look out the window at 0630, knowing that you should be asleep.
But also knowing it's 1130 and that sleeping, now, is as likely as G. W. Bush apologising for being as intelligent as his namesake.
Its the headache that crys out "Oh, for a few hours of sleep. Ten of them - whole, peaceful hours of sleep". At 1500.
Oh...jetlag.
Of course, if you're sensible you can fight this killer of joy. You can sleep on planes. You can arrange your flights to try and avoid it.
Which is fine, if there isn't a damned 8 year old sitting next to it's 3 year old demon sibling - you can image, this works fine...for about 30 seconds. Ok. Maybe 2 minutes.
Now imagine this fight continuing for some 7 hours, with the occasional cease fire, cry in their suffering mothers arms and blessed silence as they stuff their tiny faces with more E Numbers then you can shake an equation at.
Oh, jet lag.
I would wish it on my worst enemy.
Happily. They can have mine!
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Autumn
Autumn.
Autumn happens for me thrice a year, which I suppose makes me rather special.
But for me, autumn isn't a season, a time of year or even a colour scheme - damn you, you property programs.
No, to me it's a a series of events that happen every year, where ever I've been. Each on it's own can anytime, anywhere...but they never do.
The first happened weeks ago. It's a thing of sunlight and colour - as you drive or walk somewhere, the setting sun streaming across before you. The leaves on trees all golden, yellow and red - that surprise, because you've seen one tree or two in colour - but the striking sight of them all in golden sunlight.
That moment of realisation that the end is in sight. Not here yet, or even near - but inevitable.
Sight is the first - but the second is smell. This time, here, it happened last night. Dusk, late in the afternoon...the world around you in dying shades of grey. The sun, now gone...
The mist and fog swirling - but in the air, catching at your throat like the echo of great sorrow the tang, the tickle of woodsmoke in the evening air stroking the back of your throat. Permeating the air around you, the burning of wood to drive back the cold and hunger of night.
Finally...last of all comes the moment when all around you is dark. Through the windows you see nothing but darkness and lights. Not yet six o'clock and the people hide in their homes. All desperately trying to deny the truth - that the night has won again.
That the sun and moon have lost to the stars, fleeing the sky from a terrible force they can never defeat.
Winter.
And winter is here.
Autumn happens for me thrice a year, which I suppose makes me rather special.
But for me, autumn isn't a season, a time of year or even a colour scheme - damn you, you property programs.
No, to me it's a a series of events that happen every year, where ever I've been. Each on it's own can anytime, anywhere...but they never do.
The first happened weeks ago. It's a thing of sunlight and colour - as you drive or walk somewhere, the setting sun streaming across before you. The leaves on trees all golden, yellow and red - that surprise, because you've seen one tree or two in colour - but the striking sight of them all in golden sunlight.
That moment of realisation that the end is in sight. Not here yet, or even near - but inevitable.
Sight is the first - but the second is smell. This time, here, it happened last night. Dusk, late in the afternoon...the world around you in dying shades of grey. The sun, now gone...
The mist and fog swirling - but in the air, catching at your throat like the echo of great sorrow the tang, the tickle of woodsmoke in the evening air stroking the back of your throat. Permeating the air around you, the burning of wood to drive back the cold and hunger of night.
Finally...last of all comes the moment when all around you is dark. Through the windows you see nothing but darkness and lights. Not yet six o'clock and the people hide in their homes. All desperately trying to deny the truth - that the night has won again.
That the sun and moon have lost to the stars, fleeing the sky from a terrible force they can never defeat.
Winter.
And winter is here.
Monday, October 27, 2008
The temptation to ask a question.
This morning I was working in a Sexual Health Clinic, sorting out a minor issue that required administrator rights and someone on-site to poke it till it behaved.
Anyway, I was sitting there in the office, allowing the hustle and bustle of office life to flow around me. Phones ringing, people talking...
Now - I don't know about anyone else, but I can't not understand words. If I'm there, and I can hear them clearly....even if I'm reading, typing or really not paying attention, they're still there.
It's that same trick men all over the world use - the ability to recite the last few lines of a conversation, the moment a women says "You aren't listening". We might not have been, but the words are there...
Where was I? Ah, sitting in a sexual health clinic not listening, as a phone rang.
The young lass on the picked it up..."Yes, this is a sexual health clinic...yes....yes....of course...we do everything..."
At this point I heard what she said, choked on my tea (yep, I'll happily go back to that place, they made me tea first thing on a cold Monday morning) and I resisted. It was an effort, but...well...
At that moment there was nothing I wanted to do more then turn to her and say, stressing every syllable one at a time:
"You do...Everything...?"
Anyway, I was sitting there in the office, allowing the hustle and bustle of office life to flow around me. Phones ringing, people talking...
Now - I don't know about anyone else, but I can't not understand words. If I'm there, and I can hear them clearly....even if I'm reading, typing or really not paying attention, they're still there.
It's that same trick men all over the world use - the ability to recite the last few lines of a conversation, the moment a women says "You aren't listening". We might not have been, but the words are there...
Where was I? Ah, sitting in a sexual health clinic not listening, as a phone rang.
The young lass on the picked it up..."Yes, this is a sexual health clinic...yes....yes....of course...we do everything..."
At this point I heard what she said, choked on my tea (yep, I'll happily go back to that place, they made me tea first thing on a cold Monday morning) and I resisted. It was an effort, but...well...
At that moment there was nothing I wanted to do more then turn to her and say, stressing every syllable one at a time:
"You do...Everything...?"
Monday, October 20, 2008
Zombie Films
I'm quite a zombie film fan - no, really.
There's quite a lot I enjoy about them - the madness, the weirdness...the death, destruction and mayhem...
I admit, the occasional, really scantily clad young thing does help a little - even if some of the best films don't have one.
But...well....Land of the Dead, by George A. Romero.
I'm disappointed.
No, that doesn't cover it. I'm hugely disappointed by a film that should have been an A1 film. It's..well...junk. It really is.
The early films were good as films. The first - trapped in a house, zombies coming in huge waves.
The second - a shopping mall, the perfect place to survive, or not....
The third I admit I slept through. But this? It has perhaps one interesting quality - and that's not enough to save a film. One interesting character.
This was not a film about zombies. It wasn't a film about survival, rescue or horror. There was no romance or love, no gratuitous sex scene or comedy.
Nope - this film was about social parody and statement. How the rich rule the poor.
I had hopes - really, high hopes. I thought that perhaps this film might be an intelligent treatment of how man might survive the coming zombie apocalypse. A tale of a people built on the decaying corpse of the 20th century.
A people pulling together to forge a future - if not a bright one, then at least something that only comes in shades of blood and rot.
One day, one day...
There's quite a lot I enjoy about them - the madness, the weirdness...the death, destruction and mayhem...
I admit, the occasional, really scantily clad young thing does help a little - even if some of the best films don't have one.
But...well....Land of the Dead, by George A. Romero.
I'm disappointed.
No, that doesn't cover it. I'm hugely disappointed by a film that should have been an A1 film. It's..well...junk. It really is.
The early films were good as films. The first - trapped in a house, zombies coming in huge waves.
The second - a shopping mall, the perfect place to survive, or not....
The third I admit I slept through. But this? It has perhaps one interesting quality - and that's not enough to save a film. One interesting character.
This was not a film about zombies. It wasn't a film about survival, rescue or horror. There was no romance or love, no gratuitous sex scene or comedy.
Nope - this film was about social parody and statement. How the rich rule the poor.
I had hopes - really, high hopes. I thought that perhaps this film might be an intelligent treatment of how man might survive the coming zombie apocalypse. A tale of a people built on the decaying corpse of the 20th century.
A people pulling together to forge a future - if not a bright one, then at least something that only comes in shades of blood and rot.
One day, one day...
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
Vulnerable people...
While I was driving to a site today, I made a mistake.
Rare I know, but I'm not too proud to admit to them on those uncommon occasions.
This mistake was...well...not the first time I'd made this one. You see, I made the mistake of assuming that the recent banking crisis would be equally bad for everybody. That loosing a thousand points off the FTSE 100 would hurt everyone.
Job losses are bad for everyone in the economy, right?
Well...apparently...no. For you see, I tuned into women's hour on radio 4 part way through a program. And as far as the presenter and guest was concerned, this whole issue would hit women hardest.
They seem convinced that women would be caused immense trouble by the downturn and that now of all times their rights (guaranteed by laws, some very recent) should be protected with extra vigilance.
Now here's the thing - if the law mandates that a certain part of the population has more rights then another part, should you as an employer ignore this?
For the last I don't know how many years programs like Women's hour have campaigned for extra rights for female workers. Over time, they have got rights.
And - finally - they've appeared to realise that these rights are not cost neutral - that somewhere along the line there is some company paying for them. These companies that are struggling in the current recession.
And that this makes women more vulnerable.
But instead of addressing the core problems - that hiring replacements for women on maternity leave for a year costs money - no, instead of addressing the issue, the cause of the problem - cost - they can only suggest the wrong way.
Greater enforcement of the rules that are causing a problem that they wanted in the first place.
--
And before you start - I'm all for rights for women.
But every right has a cost. So I believe in reasonable rights.
Rare I know, but I'm not too proud to admit to them on those uncommon occasions.
This mistake was...well...not the first time I'd made this one. You see, I made the mistake of assuming that the recent banking crisis would be equally bad for everybody. That loosing a thousand points off the FTSE 100 would hurt everyone.
Job losses are bad for everyone in the economy, right?
Well...apparently...no. For you see, I tuned into women's hour on radio 4 part way through a program. And as far as the presenter and guest was concerned, this whole issue would hit women hardest.
They seem convinced that women would be caused immense trouble by the downturn and that now of all times their rights (guaranteed by laws, some very recent) should be protected with extra vigilance.
Now here's the thing - if the law mandates that a certain part of the population has more rights then another part, should you as an employer ignore this?
For the last I don't know how many years programs like Women's hour have campaigned for extra rights for female workers. Over time, they have got rights.
And - finally - they've appeared to realise that these rights are not cost neutral - that somewhere along the line there is some company paying for them. These companies that are struggling in the current recession.
And that this makes women more vulnerable.
But instead of addressing the core problems - that hiring replacements for women on maternity leave for a year costs money - no, instead of addressing the issue, the cause of the problem - cost - they can only suggest the wrong way.
Greater enforcement of the rules that are causing a problem that they wanted in the first place.
--
And before you start - I'm all for rights for women.
But every right has a cost. So I believe in reasonable rights.
Monday, October 13, 2008
The road to hell...
I could talk about the banking crisis. The insanity that is politics....but I'll make my point a different way.
The problem with any plan to improve the world - any part of it, from the financial system to your local street - is unexpected side effects. One cause of the sub prime mortgage mess is the US Government encouraging lending to the less well off, because owning your own home is good for society at large.
So take the game of Dungeons and Dragons - D&D. You've seen my hand wringing before about making characters, my agonising over effectiveness. So this time, for that Canadian who's smarter then me - for his game I decided to throw away efficiency - and go with the Roleplay.
We're in a swamp...surrounded with marsh and mud. About the only semi-sentient race in 20 leagues are lizard men and pirates....so lizard man it is.
Magic using lizard men are rare...so it's fighter and barbarian to choose from. But lizard men are a primitive race. They've not entirely mastered the art of fire...spears really are the height of technology...sounds perfect for a barbarian...who kills his foes with his teeth while in a killing frenzy.
Yep, very roleplay. Barbarians can't even write....perfect sense in a swamp. It'll just decay anyway...
It was at this point the DM suggested something. I'm not going to say what....but it's a little extra bit of roleplay. Took a few weeks to agree on it, as it's mostly homebrew.
So far, so good.
So I toddle along to the DM's home and arrive a little early. I make a list of everything Hrissis starts with.
It takes a whole page of paper.
Then a role some dice. In full view of everyone, I got a nice set of numbers to work with. Not unusually high. I've had better - but nothing to complain about.
So after a little work - number crunching, copying out information, thinking of a name...we have Hrissis. And once again the road to hell has found us.
Made with only the intention of being a good "roleplay" character we have Hrissis. Starting with upto three attacks (compared to the usual one) he has a standard attack of +10 (compared to the typical +9) with 1d4+6 damage, for an average of 8.5 - which is the same as for a normal barbarian. So what's so bad about this?
Why do I say he's on the pathway to hell?
Because at the drop of a hat he can go to three attacks at +12 for 1d4+8 damage. So about as good as THREE equivalent level characters.
And did I mention he's naked??
If when playing a simple game you can accidentally screw up by a factor of three - what makes governments, charities or ANYONE ELSE think they can avoid unintended side effects??
The problem with any plan to improve the world - any part of it, from the financial system to your local street - is unexpected side effects. One cause of the sub prime mortgage mess is the US Government encouraging lending to the less well off, because owning your own home is good for society at large.
So take the game of Dungeons and Dragons - D&D. You've seen my hand wringing before about making characters, my agonising over effectiveness. So this time, for that Canadian who's smarter then me - for his game I decided to throw away efficiency - and go with the Roleplay.
We're in a swamp...surrounded with marsh and mud. About the only semi-sentient race in 20 leagues are lizard men and pirates....so lizard man it is.
Magic using lizard men are rare...so it's fighter and barbarian to choose from. But lizard men are a primitive race. They've not entirely mastered the art of fire...spears really are the height of technology...sounds perfect for a barbarian...who kills his foes with his teeth while in a killing frenzy.
Yep, very roleplay. Barbarians can't even write....perfect sense in a swamp. It'll just decay anyway...
It was at this point the DM suggested something. I'm not going to say what....but it's a little extra bit of roleplay. Took a few weeks to agree on it, as it's mostly homebrew.
So far, so good.
So I toddle along to the DM's home and arrive a little early. I make a list of everything Hrissis starts with.
It takes a whole page of paper.
Then a role some dice. In full view of everyone, I got a nice set of numbers to work with. Not unusually high. I've had better - but nothing to complain about.
So after a little work - number crunching, copying out information, thinking of a name...we have Hrissis. And once again the road to hell has found us.
Made with only the intention of being a good "roleplay" character we have Hrissis. Starting with upto three attacks (compared to the usual one) he has a standard attack of +10 (compared to the typical +9) with 1d4+6 damage, for an average of 8.5 - which is the same as for a normal barbarian. So what's so bad about this?
Why do I say he's on the pathway to hell?
Because at the drop of a hat he can go to three attacks at +12 for 1d4+8 damage. So about as good as THREE equivalent level characters.
And did I mention he's naked??
If when playing a simple game you can accidentally screw up by a factor of three - what makes governments, charities or ANYONE ELSE think they can avoid unintended side effects??
Thursday, September 25, 2008
For the children
Everybody has to pay some tax.
It's the only practical way to fund things along the lines of road networks, police, defense...and I don't argue with this. Because it's for the greater good.
Not some mythical "For the greater good" which some politicians seem to believe in. No, for a strictly observable and demonstrable greater good that you can point to. "Look, you see that road? We paid for that!"
This isn't a problem to me.
This is opposed to such things as- *takes a deep breath and tries to calm down* - just look at the policies of your local governments. If it has the word "empowering" in the description it's probably an example of a fluffy "for the greater good" policy. I could find one, but it's bad for my blood pressure.
No...I couldn't resist. A few days ago the UK Prime Minister announced that that 300 million pounds would be available to give broadband to the families of poor children.
Surely this is a good idea, right? Well...actualy...no. Free internet access is available throughout most of the UK. No - really, it is. Go to your local library to access the freely available government (ie, tax payer) funded internet.
But surely it's good for the Children? Won't someone just think of the children??
Oh - yes, the children. Let's try and help the children.
Let's not be cynical and think that it's one of a number of last ditch attempts to salvage a dying administration. After all, it's not like they arn't 20% behind in the polls.
But lets look at the details of the scheme. They're proposing vouchers of upto £700 per poor family, means tested of course.
Thats...£700....well, lets see. I can order a stock, off the shelf computer from here for a shade under £200. That's for a single system, one off, from a for-profit company. Imagine the discount they'd offer for say, a thousand?
I admit, I wouldn't want to use this computer myself - but that's because I play games. We're not talking about providing games machines for the poor, but internet machines. I'd bundle office type apps with it as well...
But lets stick with £200. Because I don't believe in feeding evil empires, I'd say ignore windows and stick linux on the beast. Easier to maintain, manage and control. Oh, and it's free. Even with office apps and other toys - it's free.
But how much would it cost to use it as an internet machine?
Now, as to the cost of internet...if we were to go with a cheap dial up modem connection they're available for less then 5p per minute. That's £3 per hour...to be honest, for an hour a week that's rather expensive. For a year that's £150. Hmmm.
Broadband....with 30 seconds of hunting I can find this - internet for £10/month, broadband. Not a great service....certainly won't handle large downloads or the like - but it is enough for academic work. For all of £120 a year, constant access...
Assuming the computer is on for 4 hours a day, with a 250 watt power supply, at 10p/KWH, that's..um...£36.50 over the year in electricity.
So for a year I can get a family online for HALF what the government wants to spend, using FOR PROFIT companies. But the government seems to have forgotten something. You can't give computers away to people who don't know how to use them without providing support.
That's were I'd stick all the money made from the bulk orders. Technical support and educational materials available through the system. How do you make enough money to support that? Well, take the broadband package - get it near cost.
But allow the company to sell the users a cheap and very easy upgrade to increase their maximum download per month. Allow them to make a profit on it. Not a huge one...but enough to make it worth their while...
All in all, this scheme could be made to be very workable. It really could. Back of envelope numbers say I can give one million families internet access. (Compared to the governments
If it wasn't for a very basic point. Why are we providing it in the first place?
The government finances are in a bad way - credit crunch, falling tax revenue while costs are increasing. Why increase spending for something that could have minimal effect?
And why are we means testing this? If parents can't afford the internet, why make a distinction between those who can't quite...and those who don't work?
In my eyes, this is another government handout to the "poor and needy" - read "Long term unemployed with children" in order to buy votes and look good.
This could be a good scheme, maybe. Maybe.
But to be honest?
I believe it has as much chance of actually working on budget, with any significant and measurable improvement to education as...as....as likely as reasonable gun control laws in the UK.
No chance.
It's the only practical way to fund things along the lines of road networks, police, defense...and I don't argue with this. Because it's for the greater good.
Not some mythical "For the greater good" which some politicians seem to believe in. No, for a strictly observable and demonstrable greater good that you can point to. "Look, you see that road? We paid for that!"
This isn't a problem to me.
This is opposed to such things as- *takes a deep breath and tries to calm down* - just look at the policies of your local governments. If it has the word "empowering" in the description it's probably an example of a fluffy "for the greater good" policy. I could find one, but it's bad for my blood pressure.
No...I couldn't resist. A few days ago the UK Prime Minister announced that that 300 million pounds would be available to give broadband to the families of poor children.
Surely this is a good idea, right? Well...actualy...no. Free internet access is available throughout most of the UK. No - really, it is. Go to your local library to access the freely available government (ie, tax payer) funded internet.
But surely it's good for the Children? Won't someone just think of the children??
Oh - yes, the children. Let's try and help the children.
Let's not be cynical and think that it's one of a number of last ditch attempts to salvage a dying administration. After all, it's not like they arn't 20% behind in the polls.
But lets look at the details of the scheme. They're proposing vouchers of upto £700 per poor family, means tested of course.
Thats...£700....well, lets see. I can order a stock, off the shelf computer from here for a shade under £200. That's for a single system, one off, from a for-profit company. Imagine the discount they'd offer for say, a thousand?
I admit, I wouldn't want to use this computer myself - but that's because I play games. We're not talking about providing games machines for the poor, but internet machines. I'd bundle office type apps with it as well...
But lets stick with £200. Because I don't believe in feeding evil empires, I'd say ignore windows and stick linux on the beast. Easier to maintain, manage and control. Oh, and it's free. Even with office apps and other toys - it's free.
But how much would it cost to use it as an internet machine?
Now, as to the cost of internet...if we were to go with a cheap dial up modem connection they're available for less then 5p per minute. That's £3 per hour...to be honest, for an hour a week that's rather expensive. For a year that's £150. Hmmm.
Broadband....with 30 seconds of hunting I can find this - internet for £10/month, broadband. Not a great service....certainly won't handle large downloads or the like - but it is enough for academic work. For all of £120 a year, constant access...
Assuming the computer is on for 4 hours a day, with a 250 watt power supply, at 10p/KWH, that's..um...£36.50 over the year in electricity.
So for a year I can get a family online for HALF what the government wants to spend, using FOR PROFIT companies. But the government seems to have forgotten something. You can't give computers away to people who don't know how to use them without providing support.
That's were I'd stick all the money made from the bulk orders. Technical support and educational materials available through the system. How do you make enough money to support that? Well, take the broadband package - get it near cost.
But allow the company to sell the users a cheap and very easy upgrade to increase their maximum download per month. Allow them to make a profit on it. Not a huge one...but enough to make it worth their while...
All in all, this scheme could be made to be very workable. It really could. Back of envelope numbers say I can give one million families internet access. (Compared to the governments
If it wasn't for a very basic point. Why are we providing it in the first place?
The government finances are in a bad way - credit crunch, falling tax revenue while costs are increasing. Why increase spending for something that could have minimal effect?
And why are we means testing this? If parents can't afford the internet, why make a distinction between those who can't quite...and those who don't work?
In my eyes, this is another government handout to the "poor and needy" - read "Long term unemployed with children" in order to buy votes and look good.
This could be a good scheme, maybe. Maybe.
But to be honest?
I believe it has as much chance of actually working on budget, with any significant and measurable improvement to education as...as....as likely as reasonable gun control laws in the UK.
No chance.
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Articles of faith
There are many articles of faith that people hold.
Some of these hold true - so far, the sun has always risen tomorrow. Things fall down. The more complicated something is the more ways there are for it to go wrong.
Other articles of faith are unprovable - there is a god. He cares. There is intelligent life on Earth.
Then...then there's the ones that really do deserve a good fisking behind the bikeshed. (And if you don't know what a fisking is, look it up! It's possibly not what you think)
But today I choose to attack the belief that women make better drivers.
You see, I believe that anyone can be a bad driver - and as my evidence I present this:
Now, I'm not saying that men are better drivers.
I'm just saying be careful....you never know who's in the other car.
They're all equally dangerous.
Some of these hold true - so far, the sun has always risen tomorrow. Things fall down. The more complicated something is the more ways there are for it to go wrong.
Other articles of faith are unprovable - there is a god. He cares. There is intelligent life on Earth.
Then...then there's the ones that really do deserve a good fisking behind the bikeshed. (And if you don't know what a fisking is, look it up! It's possibly not what you think)
But today I choose to attack the belief that women make better drivers.
You see, I believe that anyone can be a bad driver - and as my evidence I present this:
It was the ultimate expression of road rage. A furious woman driver died after ramming another vehicle and spinning her wheels so fast that her own car
burst into flames.
Serena Sutton-Smith, 54, burnt to death after refusing to get out of her Vauxhall Nova as she sat with her foot flat on the accelerator.
She spun the wheels so fast that her tyres disintegrated and the metal rims sent a shower of sparks into the engine, igniting the brake fluid and setting the car on fire.
Appalled onlookers urged her to get out of the car as the flames licked around her but she told them to “F*** off”, an inquest in Gloucester was told.
Now, I'm not saying that men are better drivers.
I'm just saying be careful....you never know who's in the other car.
They're all equally dangerous.
Friday, September 19, 2008
Oh, the assumptions....
For those of you who don't follow the news as closely as I do, here's a story you may have missed.
A bar in Australia is in trouble for offering drinks vouchers to female guests who are willing to hang their underwear up on the bar. See here for a few articles...
Now, I'm not for or against this idea really, to be honest. What a business wants to do to get attention.....which they've certainly got - is up to them.
But what gets me is the response of...well...let's call it "a certain vocal minority". Let's not name names though.
Not for a few lines.
But don't take my word for it, let's start quoting..
"Carolyn Worth of Melbourne Centre Against Sexual Assault ....... said: "It sends a very bad message, and it is one made very explicit. It's almost an invitation to sexual assault.""
Lets start with the purely pedantic. If you invite someone to sexually assault you and they do, it ceases to be sexual assault. Because you asked them to...and they did what you asked. What you would call it, I don't know...rough? Weird Adult Roleplay? I don't know - but it's definitely something you've *literally* asked for.
Now secondly, more on a "synchronise your dogmas" point of view - I was under the impression that a victim of a sexual crime was never to be blamed and that they were the Victim. (It's a point I'd quibble with to a degree, but that I do agree with, mostly. But that's another post entirely).
Here, this person is claiming that actually, it is possible to provoke an assault. Definitely off message...but moving on.
Yes - it's sending a bad message. I'd agree.
But short of stopping every other bad message, what's her point? Hell, let's look at her definition of "Bad". It's something she doesn't like. Bad is a moral judgement.
How about banning all those bad messages on eating unhealthy food (aka anything but salad), replacing all those models with Real Women and insisting that everyone should cover every inch of flesh in case something bad should happen. Like...um...sunburn. Or inciting every man in three hundred yards to do something unlawful.
Actually, yes. Men.
You know, if I saw a women drunk on the streets sans underwear...I'm fairly sure I could restrain myself. I'm pretty certain that every man I work with could say the same thing. I'd go so far as saying that 99% of men would be able to restrain that inner demon forcing them to rape, pillage and murder any men, women, children and underage goats they may come across.
Because most people don't like hurting each other.
But the simple assumption by this woman is that all men are rapists. That men can not control themselves. That a little bit more flesh will tip them into a frenzy of depravity.
By her reasoning, women should stay at home hiding themselves from view to stop men triggering this bestial desire.
My message to her?
Go have a drink and CHILL.
(All quotes are taken from The Register article...but they're sprinked though out the rest of the reports. The register just happens to bring them all together. I was going to use more then one....but the rage...)
A bar in Australia is in trouble for offering drinks vouchers to female guests who are willing to hang their underwear up on the bar. See here for a few articles...
Now, I'm not for or against this idea really, to be honest. What a business wants to do to get attention.....which they've certainly got - is up to them.
But what gets me is the response of...well...let's call it "a certain vocal minority". Let's not name names though.
Not for a few lines.
But don't take my word for it, let's start quoting..
"Carolyn Worth of Melbourne Centre Against Sexual Assault ....... said: "It sends a very bad message, and it is one made very explicit. It's almost an invitation to sexual assault.""
Lets start with the purely pedantic. If you invite someone to sexually assault you and they do, it ceases to be sexual assault. Because you asked them to...and they did what you asked. What you would call it, I don't know...rough? Weird Adult Roleplay? I don't know - but it's definitely something you've *literally* asked for.
Now secondly, more on a "synchronise your dogmas" point of view - I was under the impression that a victim of a sexual crime was never to be blamed and that they were the Victim. (It's a point I'd quibble with to a degree, but that I do agree with, mostly. But that's another post entirely).
Here, this person is claiming that actually, it is possible to provoke an assault. Definitely off message...but moving on.
Yes - it's sending a bad message. I'd agree.
But short of stopping every other bad message, what's her point? Hell, let's look at her definition of "Bad". It's something she doesn't like. Bad is a moral judgement.
How about banning all those bad messages on eating unhealthy food (aka anything but salad), replacing all those models with Real Women and insisting that everyone should cover every inch of flesh in case something bad should happen. Like...um...sunburn. Or inciting every man in three hundred yards to do something unlawful.
Actually, yes. Men.
You know, if I saw a women drunk on the streets sans underwear...I'm fairly sure I could restrain myself. I'm pretty certain that every man I work with could say the same thing. I'd go so far as saying that 99% of men would be able to restrain that inner demon forcing them to rape, pillage and murder any men, women, children and underage goats they may come across.
Because most people don't like hurting each other.
But the simple assumption by this woman is that all men are rapists. That men can not control themselves. That a little bit more flesh will tip them into a frenzy of depravity.
By her reasoning, women should stay at home hiding themselves from view to stop men triggering this bestial desire.
My message to her?
Go have a drink and CHILL.
(All quotes are taken from The Register article...but they're sprinked though out the rest of the reports. The register just happens to bring them all together. I was going to use more then one....but the rage...)
Monday, September 8, 2008
Equality junk...
Now, if you've been here for a while, you may have noticed something.
I believe in quality - not the biased, me first equality of most modern feminists - but Equality, between everyone. After all, isn't fairness....fair?
But "Being fair" doesn't often come into the matter - take for example, this report by the UK government quango that complains about the lack of equality.
I'm not going to deal with the whole report - my lunch just isn't that long. But lets look at a couple of points, while I'm here..
First, I'm going to ignore the "Are these really the most powerful jobs?" argument - because that's very open to debate. Certainly they have power...maybe not The Most Power, but...
But anyway, back to the point. From the press release..
"There are fewer women MPs in Westminster, where they make up just 19.3 percent of all MPs. "
That's from the third paragraph. But looking into the report, the change, this "fewer women" was a drop of....wait for it...0.2%.
Or, to be clear - one female MP died, Gwyneth Dunwoody, the longest serving female MP in Parliament. So to make their point, they use the death of a long serving public servant (and no matter your political views, she was a public servant) to make their case.
They don't mention that a female candidate attempted to replace her - Tamsin Dunwoody, her daughter. They forget that she lost the seat because, by a huge margin.
But - nope - this is evidence that "women's power" is increasing ever so slowly.
One death.
Talking of one...let's talk about Prime Ministers...let's talk about Margaret Thatcher- one women. How many years in power...?
Nothing like a fair, unbiased report...but no, this report has an axe to grind.
--
Or another little quibble.
One of the categories they look at is..."Small businesses with women the majority of directors" - no direct link, it's in the PDF they link to.
So lets be clear here - based on last years figures, 14% of small businesses were controlled by women. Sounds clear, right? Or maybe not...
I believe in quality - not the biased, me first equality of most modern feminists - but Equality, between everyone. After all, isn't fairness....fair?
But "Being fair" doesn't often come into the matter - take for example, this report by the UK government quango that complains about the lack of equality.
I'm not going to deal with the whole report - my lunch just isn't that long. But lets look at a couple of points, while I'm here..
First, I'm going to ignore the "Are these really the most powerful jobs?" argument - because that's very open to debate. Certainly they have power...maybe not The Most Power, but...
But anyway, back to the point. From the press release..
"There are fewer women MPs in Westminster, where they make up just 19.3 percent of all MPs. "
That's from the third paragraph. But looking into the report, the change, this "fewer women" was a drop of....wait for it...0.2%.
Or, to be clear - one female MP died, Gwyneth Dunwoody, the longest serving female MP in Parliament. So to make their point, they use the death of a long serving public servant (and no matter your political views, she was a public servant) to make their case.
They don't mention that a female candidate attempted to replace her - Tamsin Dunwoody, her daughter. They forget that she lost the seat because, by a huge margin.
But - nope - this is evidence that "women's power" is increasing ever so slowly.
One death.
Talking of one...let's talk about Prime Ministers...let's talk about Margaret Thatcher- one women. How many years in power...?
Nothing like a fair, unbiased report...but no, this report has an axe to grind.
--
Or another little quibble.
One of the categories they look at is..."Small businesses with women the majority of directors" - no direct link, it's in the PDF they link to.
So lets be clear here - based on last years figures, 14% of small businesses were controlled by women. Sounds clear, right? Or maybe not...
- Husband and wife teams don't count - not a female majority
- Small businesses with only one "director" don't count. Definition is plural
- Any even mix doesn't out
- If you've got an odd numbered board - which is common to prevent deadlocks - and it's even apart from the casting vote...it doesn't count
So this "clear" definition hides a multitude of excluded directors. And it's such an odd definition to use...not the percentage of small business directors who are female - but the majority of female controlled boards. It's not directly comparable to well, anything - it's a useless number.
Call me cynical, but why pick such an odd definition - unless the more typical one doesn't show the point you want?
--
And one final point. I'm willing to believe "female power" is slowly increasing, over all. But I'm finding it increasingly hard to take this report seriously. Take this paragraph, copied completely without edits - but the bold is mine...
"This year's report, which traditionally estimates the number of years at the present rate of progress it will take for women to achieve equality in key areas, indicates that compared to previous year's predictions it will now take 15 years longer (a total of 55 years) for women to achieve equal status at senior levels in the judiciary, and women directors in FTSE 100 companies could be waiting in the wings a further 8 years (a total of 73 years)."
55 years + 8 years = 63 years.
This report has odd non-obvious definitions, uses the death of one person as a significant statistical point and can't even COUNT.
So being interested in Equality, what do I think of this report?
Well, what do you think I think?
Saturday, September 6, 2008
I have a dream...
There are many dreams that people dream.
Some dream of equality and opportunity for all. Others dream of chocolate and summer. Still others wake with memories of dreams that really shouldn't be mentioned near anyone under, ohhh, 25. Even then, cold showers advised.
This morning, I wasn't any of those people.
This morning I climbed into awareness from the deepest, darkest pits of childrens literature. A den of sin and depravity that would shame the worst of us.
I was dreaming....of the Famous Five.
Yep, that's right. Island off the coast of a small fishing village and all.
And in this dream, all I wanted - no really, ALL I wanted was a cold ice cream on the beach.
Sad, isn't it?
Some dream of equality and opportunity for all. Others dream of chocolate and summer. Still others wake with memories of dreams that really shouldn't be mentioned near anyone under, ohhh, 25. Even then, cold showers advised.
This morning, I wasn't any of those people.
This morning I climbed into awareness from the deepest, darkest pits of childrens literature. A den of sin and depravity that would shame the worst of us.
I was dreaming....of the Famous Five.
Yep, that's right. Island off the coast of a small fishing village and all.
And in this dream, all I wanted - no really, ALL I wanted was a cold ice cream on the beach.
Sad, isn't it?
Thursday, September 4, 2008
Mornings
Morning is not my favourite time of day.
There's no real surprise here - you're warm, cosy and tucked under a quilt, with eyes closed and mind a million miles away...
So being ripped from that little spot of paradise is always going to be aggravating. But what's really annoying me of late is other people in the morning.
Here's a little guide to Me in the Morning.
1) If you wake me up and tell me to do something, or want me to remember something...don't bother.
The odds are if you're lucky - and I mean extremely lucky - I might remember you woke me up. Maybe.
I live with cats, so I'm perfectly used to being woken up then falling asleep with virtually no memory of it. If you do happen to try and it fails, it's your own darn fault!
2) My alarm in the morning is annoying. I accept this.
Complaining about it won't help.
Why not? Because I use it because it's annoying!
It's on my mobile, so it could be hidden anywhere - and I have to get out of bed to search.
It goes off every five minutes so if I do hit snooze...it's not for long...
It's loud so I can hear it.
And it's the most annoying tune I can find - because it has to be!
So if you find the thing annoying.....find me a replacement that works, rather then complain!
3) When I go running in the morning, I like to have a shower the minute I get back...mainly because being hot and sweaty isn't my favourite thing in the world.
So asking me to do something when I get back might annoy.
Asking me to do something that involves going upstairs will probably annoy.
Saying that I need to go downstairs and then upstairs will certainly irritate.
Doing it twice, before I've had a cup of tea will make me sarcastic.
You've been warned..
There's no real surprise here - you're warm, cosy and tucked under a quilt, with eyes closed and mind a million miles away...
So being ripped from that little spot of paradise is always going to be aggravating. But what's really annoying me of late is other people in the morning.
Here's a little guide to Me in the Morning.
1) If you wake me up and tell me to do something, or want me to remember something...don't bother.
The odds are if you're lucky - and I mean extremely lucky - I might remember you woke me up. Maybe.
I live with cats, so I'm perfectly used to being woken up then falling asleep with virtually no memory of it. If you do happen to try and it fails, it's your own darn fault!
2) My alarm in the morning is annoying. I accept this.
Complaining about it won't help.
Why not? Because I use it because it's annoying!
It's on my mobile, so it could be hidden anywhere - and I have to get out of bed to search.
It goes off every five minutes so if I do hit snooze...it's not for long...
It's loud so I can hear it.
And it's the most annoying tune I can find - because it has to be!
So if you find the thing annoying.....find me a replacement that works, rather then complain!
3) When I go running in the morning, I like to have a shower the minute I get back...mainly because being hot and sweaty isn't my favourite thing in the world.
So asking me to do something when I get back might annoy.
Asking me to do something that involves going upstairs will probably annoy.
Saying that I need to go downstairs and then upstairs will certainly irritate.
Doing it twice, before I've had a cup of tea will make me sarcastic.
You've been warned..
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
Oh, the sanity
The joys of joined up thinking....
I'm working for one public body, which has sites co-located with another publicly funded body. The teams are integrated, because...well...it makes sense. It would make more sense for everyone to belong to the same organisation, but that's life.
The problem though? Between the two organisations, on the level of IT there's no trust what-so-ever.
We're talking so little trust that the computers here for my organisation can't access any IP addresses outside of a tiny, tiny range....we've got so little access that actually installing a printer - one of the most basic tasks imaginable is taking an hour...
....because they need to permit this IP address to contact another IP address...which was blocked, by hand, on the switch....
...and I've had no tea for hours...
....aarrrgggghhhh!!!!
I'm working for one public body, which has sites co-located with another publicly funded body. The teams are integrated, because...well...it makes sense. It would make more sense for everyone to belong to the same organisation, but that's life.
The problem though? Between the two organisations, on the level of IT there's no trust what-so-ever.
We're talking so little trust that the computers here for my organisation can't access any IP addresses outside of a tiny, tiny range....we've got so little access that actually installing a printer - one of the most basic tasks imaginable is taking an hour...
....because they need to permit this IP address to contact another IP address...which was blocked, by hand, on the switch....
...and I've had no tea for hours...
....aarrrgggghhhh!!!!
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
A comic interlude
Because of the request in the comments, here's another post.
I may talk about death at a later point - but now is not a good time. I've had far to much to drink to do that incoherently.
Instead, I have a fundamental question.
Both this and last saturday I had to go into town for trousers. The first time to buy them, the second to replace them. Now, both times I went to the same store - BHS - and both times I tried them off first.
Now, that store has rooms to try things on in, and both times I did what I and most other people would do. I used the first room on the left that was empty. (Most people look from left to right...no, really, we do. Try it sometime.)
The first time, I hung up the trousers, took off my jacket, went to hang it up - and noticed there were a few things which had been left in there. Specifically...specifically someone had taken in a number of things that I'll simply term "Skimpy and Revealing".
Oh well....try on trousers, no problem, I went to buy them.
Next week I went to return them and get a different pair, after they failed me in an unfortunate manner. However - this time, before heading into the changing rooms I checked for any signs indicating male or female.
I kept an eye out for such indications, but finding none, I used the first room to the left again. Only to be confronted by more products that on very casual observation appeared to be made...well, not much.
Now, my question?
Was I just unlucky, or is there women's underwear in every not strictly male changing room on the planet?
If so, Why??
I may talk about death at a later point - but now is not a good time. I've had far to much to drink to do that incoherently.
Instead, I have a fundamental question.
Both this and last saturday I had to go into town for trousers. The first time to buy them, the second to replace them. Now, both times I went to the same store - BHS - and both times I tried them off first.
Now, that store has rooms to try things on in, and both times I did what I and most other people would do. I used the first room on the left that was empty. (Most people look from left to right...no, really, we do. Try it sometime.)
The first time, I hung up the trousers, took off my jacket, went to hang it up - and noticed there were a few things which had been left in there. Specifically...specifically someone had taken in a number of things that I'll simply term "Skimpy and Revealing".
Oh well....try on trousers, no problem, I went to buy them.
Next week I went to return them and get a different pair, after they failed me in an unfortunate manner. However - this time, before heading into the changing rooms I checked for any signs indicating male or female.
I kept an eye out for such indications, but finding none, I used the first room to the left again. Only to be confronted by more products that on very casual observation appeared to be made...well, not much.
Now, my question?
Was I just unlucky, or is there women's underwear in every not strictly male changing room on the planet?
If so, Why??
Friday, August 15, 2008
Thursday, August 14, 2008
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
Point of decision
We are responsible.
We all are, in some ways responsible. for many things.
But for some things - our four legged friends - we are totally responsible.
There is no way to back out - to say, it's not our fault. We feed them; house them; we twist their natural patterns of life into things to suit us. They are more our responsibility then our children - for if we fail children they can be taken away. Schools will notice, doctors or nurses. Later on, they can leave.
But our pets - they are our responsibilities. Every ounce of suffering is ours to give - or take away.
We have to make the decisions.
But when do you make them?
The day you're told she's ill, and is going to die? We all die, some sooner then others. Right now, she's just got some odd symptoms and a bad blood test. Nothing will happen for months.
So you out it off, you say she's happy. It can wait - till there's something wrong with here.
Perhaps a little later, when the first overt symptoms develop. The arthritis starts to kick in. The thyroid problems need daily medicine - just like any human sufferer. But it's only a tablet, nothing to drastic. And she's still playing with her mice...till she eats them...
And anyway, one pill a day is easy. She just can't climb trees and catch birds midflight.
Or maybe later still, when she develops a hunger - a terrible desire for food, earlier and sooner every month. Still, it's only food - what's a doubling of the catfood bill?
Even then you think of the past - when we nursed her through a usually lethal disease, as she sat, night after night curled up with me. Hardly eating, being coaxed to take the smallest mouthful. Still, we made it.
What's a bit of cat food?
And slowly down the garden path of complacency you stroll, carrying the poor mite with you.
Sometime, somewhere you reach the last few turns in the path.
Shedding of fur, sleeping almost all the time. Her coat changing in days to a dull, differently textured affair. She's not comfortable anywhere, always shifting and moving.
Unsteady on her feet, sitting down the moment something or someone touches her. Not because she doesn't want to, but so that she can't fall.
Still walking down that garden path, knowing that one day - one day soon - a phonecall will be made. A friend called - a friend who's known her as long as us, who provides the drugs and advice. Tests and knowledge - the vet.
Some day the vet will visit, with a Solution. And every day you think that maybe....maybe the view tomorrow won't be that bad. Maybe I don't have to call.
But every day the path gets shorter - and you know how bad the garden is, down at the very end.
But the responsibility to make the decision...that's still yours. All yours.
And nothing can take it away.
We all are, in some ways responsible. for many things.
But for some things - our four legged friends - we are totally responsible.
There is no way to back out - to say, it's not our fault. We feed them; house them; we twist their natural patterns of life into things to suit us. They are more our responsibility then our children - for if we fail children they can be taken away. Schools will notice, doctors or nurses. Later on, they can leave.
But our pets - they are our responsibilities. Every ounce of suffering is ours to give - or take away.
We have to make the decisions.
But when do you make them?
The day you're told she's ill, and is going to die? We all die, some sooner then others. Right now, she's just got some odd symptoms and a bad blood test. Nothing will happen for months.
So you out it off, you say she's happy. It can wait - till there's something wrong with here.
Perhaps a little later, when the first overt symptoms develop. The arthritis starts to kick in. The thyroid problems need daily medicine - just like any human sufferer. But it's only a tablet, nothing to drastic. And she's still playing with her mice...till she eats them...
And anyway, one pill a day is easy. She just can't climb trees and catch birds midflight.
Or maybe later still, when she develops a hunger - a terrible desire for food, earlier and sooner every month. Still, it's only food - what's a doubling of the catfood bill?
Even then you think of the past - when we nursed her through a usually lethal disease, as she sat, night after night curled up with me. Hardly eating, being coaxed to take the smallest mouthful. Still, we made it.
What's a bit of cat food?
And slowly down the garden path of complacency you stroll, carrying the poor mite with you.
Sometime, somewhere you reach the last few turns in the path.
Shedding of fur, sleeping almost all the time. Her coat changing in days to a dull, differently textured affair. She's not comfortable anywhere, always shifting and moving.
Unsteady on her feet, sitting down the moment something or someone touches her. Not because she doesn't want to, but so that she can't fall.
Still walking down that garden path, knowing that one day - one day soon - a phonecall will be made. A friend called - a friend who's known her as long as us, who provides the drugs and advice. Tests and knowledge - the vet.
Some day the vet will visit, with a Solution. And every day you think that maybe....maybe the view tomorrow won't be that bad. Maybe I don't have to call.
But every day the path gets shorter - and you know how bad the garden is, down at the very end.
But the responsibility to make the decision...that's still yours. All yours.
And nothing can take it away.
Friday, August 8, 2008
Ok, to make it really clear.
Ok, to make it really clear.
Person one makes a choice.
That choice forces person two to do something.
Person one has power over person two.
Everyone with me so far?
What I heard on the radio was person one being applauded for making a choice that affects person two's life. Person two was being told that they should be more co-operative and do exactly what they were told, so person one can do what they want.
Or - person two was being told by an academic that person one should be in power over them, and that they should roll over and be a good puppy.
Academic didn't realise that they were supporting a position not of equality but one of power.
Where as I believe in equality, choice and coming to agreements together.
Everyone clear now?
Person one makes a choice.
That choice forces person two to do something.
Person one has power over person two.
Everyone with me so far?
What I heard on the radio was person one being applauded for making a choice that affects person two's life. Person two was being told that they should be more co-operative and do exactly what they were told, so person one can do what they want.
Or - person two was being told by an academic that person one should be in power over them, and that they should roll over and be a good puppy.
Academic didn't realise that they were supporting a position not of equality but one of power.
Where as I believe in equality, choice and coming to agreements together.
Everyone clear now?
Let me rephrase that...
After Loralai got the wrong end of the stick, I'm going to give another scenario that illustrates what I mean, that might be a little clearer.
Lets imagine a married couple, living in their house.
The wife nags the husband for a few years that they need to redecorate. But after being put off for a few years, she goes ahead and just starts.
Not just one room, but most of downstairs. The husband, against his will helps - because if he doesn't, he won't be able to sit down anywhere for several months...
However - finally, the end is in sight. The main thing left to do is the kitchen...but he's stopped from doing it, instead another room is emptied out and painted - because the wife refuses to allow paint brushes to be cleaned in her new sink once it's in place.
-
We have a scenario where one person is entirely in the power of the other. They have no choice, but must simply go with the whims of of the other.
In the last post, we had a women, declaring that she "wanted it all" and was going back to work and simply expected the husband to pick up the slack.
My point was that the feminist professor seemed unable to see that, well, actually...this was somewhat understandable. Instead of being a Serious Problem that Must Be Addressed, which she seemed to think.
That the person with the power might be responsible...didn't seem to occur to her.
---
Yes, I know - with working, money and marriage things are never that simple. I agree with you Loralai there. I was using the situation as a hypothetical example...not gospel.
Lets imagine a married couple, living in their house.
The wife nags the husband for a few years that they need to redecorate. But after being put off for a few years, she goes ahead and just starts.
Not just one room, but most of downstairs. The husband, against his will helps - because if he doesn't, he won't be able to sit down anywhere for several months...
However - finally, the end is in sight. The main thing left to do is the kitchen...but he's stopped from doing it, instead another room is emptied out and painted - because the wife refuses to allow paint brushes to be cleaned in her new sink once it's in place.
-
We have a scenario where one person is entirely in the power of the other. They have no choice, but must simply go with the whims of of the other.
In the last post, we had a women, declaring that she "wanted it all" and was going back to work and simply expected the husband to pick up the slack.
My point was that the feminist professor seemed unable to see that, well, actually...this was somewhat understandable. Instead of being a Serious Problem that Must Be Addressed, which she seemed to think.
That the person with the power might be responsible...didn't seem to occur to her.
---
Yes, I know - with working, money and marriage things are never that simple. I agree with you Loralai there. I was using the situation as a hypothetical example...not gospel.
Thursday, August 7, 2008
Power
There are many definitions of power. There's electrical power, mechanical power...but the one I was thinking of was the power to determine your own life.
I was listening to the Radio on the way home last night, to what I can only describe as a Feminist Professor who was talking on the subject of Women at Work.
Now, apparently, or so we were being told, one of the main reasons that women don't go back to work after having children is because men don't take up the slack in the house work, the child care and the like.
But listening there seemed to be a point she missed. Not that I would claim to be superior to a Cambridge University Professor...but us plebs occasionally have a point.
You see, to me listening, it sounded as if the person with the power - the woman - made a choice to go back to work.
The man was expected to accept this decision - and in order to allow the woman to return to work was expected to pick up the slack.
So after working his socks off to pay for the family in the mean time, he's told she's going back to work...and now he can work even harder. Because she's decided to "have it all". The kids, the job.
I can understand why he might not be thrilled by this idea - he just has to adapt and work harder to do what she wants.
But in all honesty - don't we all drag our feet when someone uses power to dictate to us? When we're told do something because another wants it done, for their own reasons?
This academic seemed to miss the minor fact that in the situations that were described one person had the power of choice - and one didn't. That the person who didn't make the choice was expected to work harder without complaint.
She didn't even appear to notice.
----
Before anyone says the obvious - I'm all for equality. But I'm for equality for everyone.
What a couple wants to do is for the couple to decide - we don't need people with axes to grind on the radio complaining about whole groups of people - for the crime of not willingly accepting the consequences of other people's decisions.
There has to be a cost to "having it all" - you can't expect everything for nothing.
I was listening to the Radio on the way home last night, to what I can only describe as a Feminist Professor who was talking on the subject of Women at Work.
Now, apparently, or so we were being told, one of the main reasons that women don't go back to work after having children is because men don't take up the slack in the house work, the child care and the like.
But listening there seemed to be a point she missed. Not that I would claim to be superior to a Cambridge University Professor...but us plebs occasionally have a point.
You see, to me listening, it sounded as if the person with the power - the woman - made a choice to go back to work.
The man was expected to accept this decision - and in order to allow the woman to return to work was expected to pick up the slack.
So after working his socks off to pay for the family in the mean time, he's told she's going back to work...and now he can work even harder. Because she's decided to "have it all". The kids, the job.
I can understand why he might not be thrilled by this idea - he just has to adapt and work harder to do what she wants.
But in all honesty - don't we all drag our feet when someone uses power to dictate to us? When we're told do something because another wants it done, for their own reasons?
This academic seemed to miss the minor fact that in the situations that were described one person had the power of choice - and one didn't. That the person who didn't make the choice was expected to work harder without complaint.
She didn't even appear to notice.
----
Before anyone says the obvious - I'm all for equality. But I'm for equality for everyone.
What a couple wants to do is for the couple to decide - we don't need people with axes to grind on the radio complaining about whole groups of people - for the crime of not willingly accepting the consequences of other people's decisions.
There has to be a cost to "having it all" - you can't expect everything for nothing.
Wednesday, August 6, 2008
Greedy me
You all know me....you all know I believe I can do just about anything, with a few exceptions based mainly on the fact I'm a man...and I can't dance.
For a long time - some 17 years - I've thought I could make money on the stockmarket. Ever since I could understand the concept...it seemed so simple. No - really, it did. Wait till people over react to some news, take advantage of the fact.
So, the other month, I took advantage of this fact...
When the Bradford&Bingley share price noise dived to 32p per share, I bought some. I bought 250 of the things at their lowest price for...well....since they were sold in the first place.
Now they've risen in value to about 55p per share. Now I have a dilemma.
I could sell them and make my profit...or I could hang on to them for the dividend. Unlikely to yield much for the next 1-3 years, but after that likely to be (on an annual basis) something like 20% of the value of the origional investment.
But that's in the future...
Where as if I sold them now, I'd have to pay the fee of £15.
Thoughts people?
Beyond, "You smug git"?
For a long time - some 17 years - I've thought I could make money on the stockmarket. Ever since I could understand the concept...it seemed so simple. No - really, it did. Wait till people over react to some news, take advantage of the fact.
So, the other month, I took advantage of this fact...
When the Bradford&Bingley share price noise dived to 32p per share, I bought some. I bought 250 of the things at their lowest price for...well....since they were sold in the first place.
Now they've risen in value to about 55p per share. Now I have a dilemma.
I could sell them and make my profit...or I could hang on to them for the dividend. Unlikely to yield much for the next 1-3 years, but after that likely to be (on an annual basis) something like 20% of the value of the origional investment.
But that's in the future...
Where as if I sold them now, I'd have to pay the fee of £15.
Thoughts people?
Beyond, "You smug git"?
Monday, August 4, 2008
Forgive me father, for I have sinned
Today, while driving from one site to another I was lost in thought.
I was thinking that in many ways there are two types of environmentalist. On one hand, you have people who think of it in economic terms. That can there cost xxx to produce - but will save yyy if you recycle.
That, to me, makes sense. Enough that I sometimes recycle....use power saving computer options....
Then there's the other type - those who approach the Environment as if it was God. The eco-priests. You will know them by their hessian bags, the militant vegetarianism and the obsession with cycling.
Being a roleplayer - and amused with odd scenes - and bored out of my skull on the A1M I thought about what an eco-priest would be like....
As I drove an encounter slowly formed in my mind. Picture, if you will, a small temple to nature formed from living trees bent this way and that. The floor covered with pine needles, and at one end, beneath the alter where progress and sanity have already been sacrificed is a confessional.
And at that confessional, I kneel...
Me: Forgive me father for I have sinned, it has been a week since my last confession. Father, today while in garden of this world, I sinned. I enjoyed driving.
*Shocked silence*
Eco-Priest: My son...how did this terrible, abominable thing occur?
Me: I was driving from site to site for work-
Eco-Priest: So it was not an actual drive for pleasure. It had purpose, meaning?
Me: Yes father.
Eco-Priest: Your soul may yet be saved...but there is more to confess.
Me: Yes father. As I drove in the fens I did drive at speed, more so then required for efficiency. I accelerated without just cause and braked with joy, cornering around the narrow fen roads as if a rally driver.
Eco-Priest: *Sigh* Did you at least ensure that you minimsed your load - carrying no more weight then needed, taking the shortest route and obeying the traffic laws?
Me: Mostly father. Mostly.
Eco-Priest: An act of contrition and a donation to the rainforest box. In the name of the....
--
Yes, I really did enjoy today's driving. Yes, I did average less then the speed limit.
I had to....you can't take those corners at 60mph. Some are 90 degrees!
I was thinking that in many ways there are two types of environmentalist. On one hand, you have people who think of it in economic terms. That can there cost xxx
That, to me, makes sense. Enough that I sometimes recycle....use power saving computer options....
Then there's the other type - those who approach the Environment as if it was God. The eco-priests. You will know them by their hessian bags, the militant vegetarianism and the obsession with cycling.
Being a roleplayer - and amused with odd scenes - and bored out of my skull on the A1M I thought about what an eco-priest would be like....
As I drove an encounter slowly formed in my mind. Picture, if you will, a small temple to nature formed from living trees bent this way and that. The floor covered with pine needles, and at one end, beneath the alter where progress and sanity have already been sacrificed is a confessional.
And at that confessional, I kneel...
Me: Forgive me father for I have sinned, it has been a week since my last confession. Father, today while in garden of this world, I sinned. I enjoyed driving.
*Shocked silence*
Eco-Priest: My son...how did this terrible, abominable thing occur?
Me: I was driving from site to site for work-
Eco-Priest: So it was not an actual drive for pleasure. It had purpose, meaning?
Me: Yes father.
Eco-Priest: Your soul may yet be saved...but there is more to confess.
Me: Yes father. As I drove in the fens I did drive at speed, more so then required for efficiency. I accelerated without just cause and braked with joy, cornering around the narrow fen roads as if a rally driver.
Eco-Priest: *Sigh* Did you at least ensure that you minimsed your load - carrying no more weight then needed, taking the shortest route and obeying the traffic laws?
Me: Mostly father. Mostly.
Eco-Priest: An act of contrition and a donation to the rainforest box. In the name of the....
--
Yes, I really did enjoy today's driving. Yes, I did average less then the speed limit.
I had to....you can't take those corners at 60mph. Some are 90 degrees!
Thursday, July 31, 2008
You can see the tree, but you miss the forest...
Warning: Heavy WoW content.
Gumdrops, over here wants to try and change my mind. He thinks I should respec my Warcraft Main Character to a discipline priest.
And he does have some points...good ones. He even has some stats.
But he misses the forest, because he's looking at the tree.
Looking at this site here, approximately 1/3 priests in a 2000pt rated 2v2 team are a shadow/disc spec, like mine. But on the other hand, priests account for only 7% of characters in 2v2 teams with scores of 2200 or better - see here.
If I build a character for PvP, what I should do is clear - forget the priest. 72% of characters in all 2200pt or better teams are....druids, rogues and warriors. In the top teams, druids and warriors alone account for more than 50% of the total.
So Gummy, my response is - don't look at the tree. Playing a priest in PvP is fairly pointless..and I'm not playing that much of a minority build.
Examine the forest - you should be saying "Level a druid!"!
Gumdrops, over here wants to try and change my mind. He thinks I should respec my Warcraft Main Character to a discipline priest.
And he does have some points...good ones. He even has some stats.
But he misses the forest, because he's looking at the tree.
Looking at this site here, approximately 1/3 priests in a 2000pt rated 2v2 team are a shadow/disc spec, like mine. But on the other hand, priests account for only 7% of characters in 2v2 teams with scores of 2200 or better - see here.
If I build a character for PvP, what I should do is clear - forget the priest. 72% of characters in all 2200pt or better teams are....druids, rogues and warriors. In the top teams, druids and warriors alone account for more than 50% of the total.
So Gummy, my response is - don't look at the tree. Playing a priest in PvP is fairly pointless..and I'm not playing that much of a minority build.
Examine the forest - you should be saying "Level a druid!"!
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
Minister for Women and Equality
Meet Harriet Harmon. She's the labour minister for Women and Equality.
Now, for the moment lets ignore the impossibility of being the minister for "Women and Equality" - how you can be a minister for a special interest group and for equality at the same
time...
Lets instead look here. We have here the video of her proposing alterations to the current laws on murder and manslaughter in the UK.
First, we have her abolishing the current partial defenses that exist for men. Rage caused by sexual infidelity....well, if I came home to find the wife I loved having sex with another man I'm not sure I'd be able to just turn around and walk away. But no, that's got to go.
If a man has been nagged senseless for years - a verbal tirade, constant attacks and nagging continuing to the point of madness....nope, not a provoking factor.
Men are evil. Men should never be allowed a defense to kill a women.
But then....well, then we get to women. And here she establishes clearly her intention that a women who fears serious violence should always have the charge downgraded to manslaughter...and the example she gives is clearly premeditated.
What's so wrong with this?
Well, if you've gone far enough to plan a murder, why don't you report him to the police? Walk out the door? Tell someone?
What if it's just that - the fear. Fear might not be justified...ignoring the risks of say, mental illness...what if the fear doesn't exist? How the hell can you prove she was afraid? How can you prove "years of abuse"?
If you can prove it, the police will quite happily put him in jail. Present evidence to a magistrate and you will get restraining orders and a host of other aids.
But what if it doesn't exist? It wouldn't take much effort to create the image of fear. A few whispered words here, there...a few secrets between friends....or even lie to the court. A little decent acting...
My point is that while this Minister for "Equality" is removing a partial shield to one group, she's given the other side body armour and a helmet. Either Men and Women are equal in the eyes of the law.
Either killing your spouse is bad and wrong - or it isn't.
It shouldn't matter if it's a man or a women...either a defense is valid - or its not. But lets see what Harriet said.
Balance free...no excuses for men, but for gods sake help those poor, defenseless kitten- women.
Giving women a pass to kill men isn't right - but don't believe me. Ask Erin Pizzey, who founded the women's shelter movement in the UK. Of course, the feminists hate her...you see, she has a pesky believe that women can be as violent as men.
My hope is that this stupidity never comes close to law. Killing is wrong, for most reasons. Handing out excuse card - bad idea.
---
And before anyone says the obvious...no, I believe domestic violence is bad and wrong. There is rarely an excuse to kill those you love - mercy killings are another topic.
Women should be offered help to leave abusive relationships safely.
But so should men.
--
Now, for the moment lets ignore the impossibility of being the minister for "Women and Equality" - how you can be a minister for a special interest group and for equality at the same
time...
Lets instead look here. We have here the video of her proposing alterations to the current laws on murder and manslaughter in the UK.
First, we have her abolishing the current partial defenses that exist for men. Rage caused by sexual infidelity....well, if I came home to find the wife I loved having sex with another man I'm not sure I'd be able to just turn around and walk away. But no, that's got to go.
If a man has been nagged senseless for years - a verbal tirade, constant attacks and nagging continuing to the point of madness....nope, not a provoking factor.
Men are evil. Men should never be allowed a defense to kill a women.
But then....well, then we get to women. And here she establishes clearly her intention that a women who fears serious violence should always have the charge downgraded to manslaughter...and the example she gives is clearly premeditated.
What's so wrong with this?
Well, if you've gone far enough to plan a murder, why don't you report him to the police? Walk out the door? Tell someone?
What if it's just that - the fear. Fear might not be justified...ignoring the risks of say, mental illness...what if the fear doesn't exist? How the hell can you prove she was afraid? How can you prove "years of abuse"?
If you can prove it, the police will quite happily put him in jail. Present evidence to a magistrate and you will get restraining orders and a host of other aids.
But what if it doesn't exist? It wouldn't take much effort to create the image of fear. A few whispered words here, there...a few secrets between friends....or even lie to the court. A little decent acting...
My point is that while this Minister for "Equality" is removing a partial shield to one group, she's given the other side body armour and a helmet. Either Men and Women are equal in the eyes of the law.
Either killing your spouse is bad and wrong - or it isn't.
It shouldn't matter if it's a man or a women...either a defense is valid - or its not. But lets see what Harriet said.
"What we want is an end to domestic homicide and to intervene early to stop women being beaten and we want no excuses for men to say I killed her, but only because I loved her"
Balance free...no excuses for men, but for gods sake help those poor, defenseless kitten- women.
Giving women a pass to kill men isn't right - but don't believe me. Ask Erin Pizzey, who founded the women's shelter movement in the UK. Of course, the feminists hate her...you see, she has a pesky believe that women can be as violent as men.
My hope is that this stupidity never comes close to law. Killing is wrong, for most reasons. Handing out excuse card - bad idea.
---
And before anyone says the obvious...no, I believe domestic violence is bad and wrong. There is rarely an excuse to kill those you love - mercy killings are another topic.
Women should be offered help to leave abusive relationships safely.
But so should men.
--
Does this make me evil?
While at work today, I was chatting to one of the girls from upstairs.
She tends to hang around the IT Team, while waiting for her mother. Which basically means she's hanging around about 2m away from me, so I usually end up being friendly. Because the alternative is just to be nasty.
Anyway, she was talking about taking her PGCE (aka teaching qualification) and commented to Andrew (one the several we have - there's lots here) that if he tried to talk her out of it, he'd qualify for a slapping.
So I promptly tried to talk her out of it.
Not because I really care, but...well...the idea of a 5ft, slim, (ok Helen, she is a cute brunette - but that's not the point) girl in silly shoes (2 inch heels with about 1 cm square of surface area per foot) trying to slap me was just funny.
I really wanted to see her try.
The odds of her not falling over her own shoes....
Does that make me evil?
She tends to hang around the IT Team, while waiting for her mother. Which basically means she's hanging around about 2m away from me, so I usually end up being friendly. Because the alternative is just to be nasty.
Anyway, she was talking about taking her PGCE (aka teaching qualification) and commented to Andrew (one the several we have - there's lots here) that if he tried to talk her out of it, he'd qualify for a slapping.
So I promptly tried to talk her out of it.
Not because I really care, but...well...the idea of a 5ft, slim, (ok Helen, she is a cute brunette - but that's not the point) girl in silly shoes (2 inch heels with about 1 cm square of surface area per foot) trying to slap me was just funny.
I really wanted to see her try.
The odds of her not falling over her own shoes....
Does that make me evil?
Friday, July 25, 2008
Being ill...and unwelcome truths
I hate being ill.
No - really, I do.
I agree, it has upsides. You get to sleep in, you don't have to go to work...you don't have to do anything.
But I believe the downsides more then make up for this. For example - last night at Dungeons and Dragons, I had to look up a rule. This isn't something I do very often, because the rules to me are...well, fairly straightfords. I know them all.
But this time....this time I stood there, reading the book. Having found the paragraph in question, I was distracted by someone. Distraction dealt with, I returned to the book - looking at it blankly, as its pages held no meaning for me.
I stood there, pretending to read while I tried to remember - what was I looking for?? A few moments of reconstruction...I was looking at my character sheet...looking at skills....ah, racial skills.
Find the paragraph and read it, quick. Go to close the book and realise that I couldn't remember what it said.
I really did have the attention span of a rather small gerbil.
Thats one downside...the others....well...being ill!
---
Talking of being ill, what do you do when you are? I play computer games because they share two things in common. First, they help the time to pass quickly without requiring you to move much.
And the other is that most games consist of a large number of very small, short bits. Kill one monster (or two) at a time. Loot this, make that. But nothing that requires huge concentration or co-ordination - so perfect for the ill.
But this led to a dilema for me yesterday.
There's someone in the guild, called...well, lets call him Paul. Paul and I talk when we're on, even though we've never met. Back before I left the UK, when I played much more then I do now, we chatted as we played for months.
But yesterday, he said something odd...
Now, the Elder Brother and I are both in the same Warcraft Guild. Our main characters are known to be owned by siblings. For roleplay purposes, we usualy use the pronoun suited to the character not the player...so my priestess is almost always a "she".
Why's this an issue? Well, Paul said something that shows that he thinks I was a girl. A real, honest to god girl playing warcraft.
Now, what do you say to that?
What do you say to someone who's built up an image of you based on one little detail that's never been mentioned. It probably doesn't matter - we've never actualy met, I doubt we ever will.
But do you say something, or....?
No - really, I do.
I agree, it has upsides. You get to sleep in, you don't have to go to work...you don't have to do anything.
But I believe the downsides more then make up for this. For example - last night at Dungeons and Dragons, I had to look up a rule. This isn't something I do very often, because the rules to me are...well, fairly straightfords. I know them all.
But this time....this time I stood there, reading the book. Having found the paragraph in question, I was distracted by someone. Distraction dealt with, I returned to the book - looking at it blankly, as its pages held no meaning for me.
I stood there, pretending to read while I tried to remember - what was I looking for?? A few moments of reconstruction...I was looking at my character sheet...looking at skills....ah, racial skills.
Find the paragraph and read it, quick. Go to close the book and realise that I couldn't remember what it said.
I really did have the attention span of a rather small gerbil.
Thats one downside...the others....well...being ill!
---
Talking of being ill, what do you do when you are? I play computer games because they share two things in common. First, they help the time to pass quickly without requiring you to move much.
And the other is that most games consist of a large number of very small, short bits. Kill one monster (or two) at a time. Loot this, make that. But nothing that requires huge concentration or co-ordination - so perfect for the ill.
But this led to a dilema for me yesterday.
There's someone in the guild, called...well, lets call him Paul. Paul and I talk when we're on, even though we've never met. Back before I left the UK, when I played much more then I do now, we chatted as we played for months.
But yesterday, he said something odd...
Now, the Elder Brother and I are both in the same Warcraft Guild. Our main characters are known to be owned by siblings. For roleplay purposes, we usualy use the pronoun suited to the character not the player...so my priestess is almost always a "she".
Why's this an issue? Well, Paul said something that shows that he thinks I was a girl. A real, honest to god girl playing warcraft.
Now, what do you say to that?
What do you say to someone who's built up an image of you based on one little detail that's never been mentioned. It probably doesn't matter - we've never actualy met, I doubt we ever will.
But do you say something, or....?
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
A new definition of hell
There are many things in life that can make life hell.
People, places, disease...I've got a new one for the list.
Decorating.
Right now, we're re-doing the kitchen, the hall and stairs. There's dust, everywhere. Fine particles of the stuff sitting in the air. Small bits that stick to everything and get everywhere.
The smell of paint...paint everywhere. No where you can escape, there when you wake - there when you sleep. The headache that goes with paint...dull, constant and throbbing.
Right now I'm seriously considering the brothers offer of sanctuary at his for a few days. True, the spare room is a mess. True, I won't have my laptop or other bits. True, the cats run away and hide from you.
But relief from the smell...oh I'm tempted.
People, places, disease...I've got a new one for the list.
Decorating.
Right now, we're re-doing the kitchen, the hall and stairs. There's dust, everywhere. Fine particles of the stuff sitting in the air. Small bits that stick to everything and get everywhere.
The smell of paint...paint everywhere. No where you can escape, there when you wake - there when you sleep. The headache that goes with paint...dull, constant and throbbing.
Right now I'm seriously considering the brothers offer of sanctuary at his for a few days. True, the spare room is a mess. True, I won't have my laptop or other bits. True, the cats run away and hide from you.
But relief from the smell...oh I'm tempted.
Sunday, July 20, 2008
I'll donate a pint....
A joke courtesy of Trixy...
A driver is stuck in a traffic jam on the motorway. Nothing is moving. Suddenly a man knocks on the window.
The driver rolls down his window and asks, 'What's going on?'
'Terrorists down the road have kidnapped Gordon Brown, Alistair Darling, David Miliband, and Jack Straw.
They're asking for a £10 million ransom.
Otherwise they're going to douse them with petrol, and set them on fire.
We're going from car to car, taking up a collection.'
The driver asks, 'How much is everyone giving, on average?'
'Most people are giving about a gallon.'
A driver is stuck in a traffic jam on the motorway. Nothing is moving. Suddenly a man knocks on the window.
The driver rolls down his window and asks, 'What's going on?'
'Terrorists down the road have kidnapped Gordon Brown, Alistair Darling, David Miliband, and Jack Straw.
They're asking for a £10 million ransom.
Otherwise they're going to douse them with petrol, and set them on fire.
We're going from car to car, taking up a collection.'
The driver asks, 'How much is everyone giving, on average?'
'Most people are giving about a gallon.'
I hold views
Now, you may (or may not, but I doubt it) have noticed that I hold Views.
Some of these are somewhat less then Politically Correct. But broadly, I believe in fairness - and that fairness trumps special interest.
However - and this is important - I am amenable to having my mind changed. If you can prove, with statistics and reasons I consider to be unbiased I'll freely change my mind. It has happened before...although if the source of your numbers is ultimately an organisation named "xxxx against..." or "xxxx yyyyy rights" or the like, you're going to have your work cut out for you.
But I will listen.
However, here's an example of someone I can't stand...a feminist. Now, feminists per se I don't have a problem with. In the past, they've had a point. They still may have one, in some areas - I remain Highly Unconvinced, primarily because they're only interested in one side of the coin. Women, rather then looking at everyone. (But that's a side issue).
Have a look at the site here....
Now, why do I bring this up? Because it's an example of the one sided nature of some single issue activists that just Annoys ME.
We have someone who's campaigning to have porn banned on the tube system....well, ok. But we're not talking about "porn" as most people would accept the term. We're not talking about images of actual sex, or even hugely revealing, A1 size pictures or posters used in advertising.
Nope, we're talking about such things as the page three girl. Not exactly hugely offensive.
But she wants it banned, because those evil men look at it.
But lets look at say, "Hello magazine", "Ok magazine", all the gossip and picture magazines....all these have photos of what I would imagine to be rather tasty young men, as well as all the gossip and "human interest" articles you could want to burn.
But apparently these are all right, because, well, it's for women, and not offensive. Nope, only men's soft porn must go...
And for added fun, here's a quote from the site that really pissed me off.
"Unfortunately I had to end the poll early, because a silly chap decided to put a link up on his blog and the poll was suddenly flooded with other silly people who decided to sabotage the poll."
Lets translate..."I put a poll on the site so that everyone who agrees with me can do so, but the minute someone disagreed and linked to it, I had to stop it. Because they were going to vote the wrong way."
If you're going to have a poll, at least have the guts to let people disagree. Continuing by deleting comments...
Even if I thought that her point had merit (which, in a limited way it might...I doubt it, but I can't rule it out) that alone is enough to say "Nope, ignore this".
Now, time to go comment there, I think...
Some of these are somewhat less then Politically Correct. But broadly, I believe in fairness - and that fairness trumps special interest.
However - and this is important - I am amenable to having my mind changed. If you can prove, with statistics and reasons I consider to be unbiased I'll freely change my mind. It has happened before...although if the source of your numbers is ultimately an organisation named "xxxx against..." or "xxxx yyyyy rights" or the like, you're going to have your work cut out for you.
But I will listen.
However, here's an example of someone I can't stand...a feminist. Now, feminists per se I don't have a problem with. In the past, they've had a point. They still may have one, in some areas - I remain Highly Unconvinced, primarily because they're only interested in one side of the coin. Women, rather then looking at everyone. (But that's a side issue).
Have a look at the site here....
Now, why do I bring this up? Because it's an example of the one sided nature of some single issue activists that just Annoys ME.
We have someone who's campaigning to have porn banned on the tube system....well, ok. But we're not talking about "porn" as most people would accept the term. We're not talking about images of actual sex, or even hugely revealing, A1 size pictures or posters used in advertising.
Nope, we're talking about such things as the page three girl. Not exactly hugely offensive.
But she wants it banned, because those evil men look at it.
But lets look at say, "Hello magazine", "Ok magazine", all the gossip and picture magazines....all these have photos of what I would imagine to be rather tasty young men, as well as all the gossip and "human interest" articles you could want to burn.
But apparently these are all right, because, well, it's for women, and not offensive. Nope, only men's soft porn must go...
And for added fun, here's a quote from the site that really pissed me off.
"Unfortunately I had to end the poll early, because a silly chap decided to put a link up on his blog and the poll was suddenly flooded with other silly people who decided to sabotage the poll."
Lets translate..."I put a poll on the site so that everyone who agrees with me can do so, but the minute someone disagreed and linked to it, I had to stop it. Because they were going to vote the wrong way."
If you're going to have a poll, at least have the guts to let people disagree. Continuing by deleting comments...
Even if I thought that her point had merit (which, in a limited way it might...I doubt it, but I can't rule it out) that alone is enough to say "Nope, ignore this".
Now, time to go comment there, I think...
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
What I did on my wednesday
Now, in my time I've been in many slightly odd social situations.
People who believe that horses are more important then the homeless. Those who consider a good beating to be a perfect tuesday night. Discussions as to the best way to cook a small child.
This time...after a committee meeting we're at The Darlek's place. We're not screaming Exterminarin...or drinking vodka and coke.
Well, I'm not drinking vodka and coke.
We're instead making fools of ourselves on a new toy...a "Wii fit". And it looks hilarious. No, really, it does. They haven't dragged me on it yet though...
It does look like a great motivational tool for loosing weight and/or training. Well, the opening stages of any training. Wouldn't necessarily consider it as a primary training tool to say, run a marathon.
But for the parents....
(I'll see if the Darlek and his Limpit loose much weight - they're on a 30 day binge...)
People who believe that horses are more important then the homeless. Those who consider a good beating to be a perfect tuesday night. Discussions as to the best way to cook a small child.
This time...after a committee meeting we're at The Darlek's place. We're not screaming Exterminarin...or drinking vodka and coke.
Well, I'm not drinking vodka and coke.
We're instead making fools of ourselves on a new toy...a "Wii fit". And it looks hilarious. No, really, it does. They haven't dragged me on it yet though...
It does look like a great motivational tool for loosing weight and/or training. Well, the opening stages of any training. Wouldn't necessarily consider it as a primary training tool to say, run a marathon.
But for the parents....
(I'll see if the Darlek and his Limpit loose much weight - they're on a 30 day binge...)
Tuesday, July 8, 2008
How to handle holidays
Here I am, at the bunker, wondering how to handle holidays.
My co-worker, next desk over, is taking off two days this week and all of next week...which leaves me an issue - what do you do with holiday?
I've got something like 28 days worth of the stuff - call it 25 days, of paid holiday.
Now, I'm thinking of spending two weeks later this year somewhere where they get Real Snow if I can afford it. Assuming that works out, that's 2*5 days....so 15 days left.
Yep, 15 days, three weeks for all real purposes. I can take it in days, half days, long weekends...and I don't know how I want to do it.
Take a day a month, say, fridays? Leaves me 9 months this work year (I'm thinking of my work year, no matter what Human Resources say) so thats, um, 6 days left to burn.
Or do I go somewhere? Or reserve some for a evil, nasty binge at Christmas? Or enjoy hiding from the sunshine now, when I can?
Ummm....help?
My co-worker, next desk over, is taking off two days this week and all of next week...which leaves me an issue - what do you do with holiday?
I've got something like 28 days worth of the stuff - call it 25 days, of paid holiday.
Now, I'm thinking of spending two weeks later this year somewhere where they get Real Snow if I can afford it. Assuming that works out, that's 2*5 days....so 15 days left.
Yep, 15 days, three weeks for all real purposes. I can take it in days, half days, long weekends...and I don't know how I want to do it.
Take a day a month, say, fridays? Leaves me 9 months this work year (I'm thinking of my work year, no matter what Human Resources say) so thats, um, 6 days left to burn.
Or do I go somewhere? Or reserve some for a evil, nasty binge at Christmas? Or enjoy hiding from the sunshine now, when I can?
Ummm....help?
Monday, July 7, 2008
Ten minutes in the bunker
Morning all - quick message from the bunker here, while lunch break ticks away...
I was listening to the radio this morning, as I drove down the nasty, nasty road on the way to work today. Nothing there, listening to the radio...
Today it was about something that I couldn't understand, not at first. It was about illiteracy - that small percentage of the population who can't actually read.
But here I ran into a problem.
I tried to imagine not being able to read. This turned quickly into an "imagine you can't see colour" exercise. Try, as hard as I could, I failed.
Finally, after an Eternity of Hell on the road to work, I arrived and attempted an exercise, but again I was simply unable to do it.
I could not see a word and not read it. If I tried, really, extremely hard I could read the letters before the meaning came. But even then, the meaning was always there waiting for me.
Turn the word around in my mind, reading it 10 times quickly - I could start to strip away the meaning, approach it from a new perspective. Try it - say a word to yourself, in your head. Taste each sound, change in taste. Perspective. Perspective...perspective...
But even then, focus a little and the word springs back - its meaning, uses and abuses.
So I tried french, still seeking an understanding of the issue - to understand not understanding - but even as I looked at writing I couldn't read I was still thinking, ticking away. Trying to match the words back to English. Treating it almost as misspellings, trying to twist it back into understanding.
Even then, knowing that I couldn't follow it I started to piece together limited meaning. That's a regular verb, past tense I think. Reverse that word order there to make sense. In the corner there, that's a name...
Finally I ended up on a Chinese language site - finally, I had the blessed sense of blankness. I had a wall of text that meant nothing. Even the letters were wrong, and could not be fully followed. They may not have been letters - but it didn't matter.
I had found oblivion - but still I could not understand.
For I looked away, and saw a message on the board. I saw, read and understood in less time then it took to run my eyes over the whiteboard.
How do you understand someone who lacks a skill so deeply ingrained in you that you can't not use it, even if you try?
I was listening to the radio this morning, as I drove down the nasty, nasty road on the way to work today. Nothing there, listening to the radio...
Today it was about something that I couldn't understand, not at first. It was about illiteracy - that small percentage of the population who can't actually read.
But here I ran into a problem.
I tried to imagine not being able to read. This turned quickly into an "imagine you can't see colour" exercise. Try, as hard as I could, I failed.
Finally, after an Eternity of Hell on the road to work, I arrived and attempted an exercise, but again I was simply unable to do it.
I could not see a word and not read it. If I tried, really, extremely hard I could read the letters before the meaning came. But even then, the meaning was always there waiting for me.
Turn the word around in my mind, reading it 10 times quickly - I could start to strip away the meaning, approach it from a new perspective. Try it - say a word to yourself, in your head. Taste each sound, change in taste. Perspective. Perspective...perspective...
But even then, focus a little and the word springs back - its meaning, uses and abuses.
So I tried french, still seeking an understanding of the issue - to understand not understanding - but even as I looked at writing I couldn't read I was still thinking, ticking away. Trying to match the words back to English. Treating it almost as misspellings, trying to twist it back into understanding.
Even then, knowing that I couldn't follow it I started to piece together limited meaning. That's a regular verb, past tense I think. Reverse that word order there to make sense. In the corner there, that's a name...
Finally I ended up on a Chinese language site - finally, I had the blessed sense of blankness. I had a wall of text that meant nothing. Even the letters were wrong, and could not be fully followed. They may not have been letters - but it didn't matter.
I had found oblivion - but still I could not understand.
For I looked away, and saw a message on the board. I saw, read and understood in less time then it took to run my eyes over the whiteboard.
How do you understand someone who lacks a skill so deeply ingrained in you that you can't not use it, even if you try?
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