While I'm ill...

When I'm ill I have a very clear view of what I want to do.

Very little.

I want to stay warm, I want to be distracted and above all, I don't want to do anything that will last. Because five days later I'll look back at it and think "I could do better if I was blond. Look at the lines on that!!"

But believe it or not, playing on the computer (which you'd imagine fills most of the requirements) isn't the first thing on my list.

It's about 5th.

Sleeping in a nice warm bed comes in at 4th - although, to be honest, sleeping is usually on my top 20 list of things to do. So that's not a huge surprise.

Third on the list might surprise. It's not very often that I look at porn - because, well, I'm not a fan. But 3rd is being wrapped in a blanket, with a cat curled up on my lap, watching Car Porn.

Yep - I'm a not-so-closet Topgear fan. Available on "Dave" - the one non-news channel on digital TV worth watching in the day time.

(You lot have FILTHY minds!)

Curling continues the theme with two, although not with a cat. Because they're are things cats won't do. Or can't do.

I've never tried to get kessy to cook - worth a try, do you think?

But the thing I'd rather be doing - the item at the top of my list...isn't printable.

Not printable because...well...ok.

It starts with curling. And I'm not talking about THIS.